


It's Not Living Without You

by Elizabeth01Prince



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Awkward Dancing, Drunken Shenanigans, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Angst, Kissing in the Rain, M/M, Sasha lives on, Sleepy Cuddles, Whoops I killed Negan off, glenn gets the bat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-02
Updated: 2017-05-06
Packaged: 2018-10-14 02:27:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 30
Words: 38,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10526943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elizabeth01Prince/pseuds/Elizabeth01Prince
Summary: Jesus and Daryl get together after the war with The Saviors.Will their relationship survive through hard times and the apocalypse?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! I would like to stress that I DID NOT WRITE THIS FANFICTION!! one of my best friends, Kate, wrote this and requested that I post it on here. Please keep that in mind as you read!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (This fic has been heavily modified since its original posting.)

Daryl stared up at the canopy of trees above him. The fire that he had started a few hours ago had died down, and it was beginning to get cold. He didn't mind. Feeling cold was better than feeling nothing.

He had taken to sleeping outside the walls of Alexandria. It felt too crowded inside the walls, too peaceful, too.. Normal. And he was anything but normal.

Sleeping outside the walls... good idea? Probably not. Especially with all the walkers, and Negan's men still searching for him. But he could not bear the looks of pity that were cast on him from inside the walls, the looks of pain that his friends, no, family, had given him.

Daryl lay there, guilt practically radiating off of him. He felt so damn guilty, and the nightmares continued to replay themselves over and over in his mind.

_"You Killed Him!" Maggie screeched._

_"I know" Daryl whispered. "I know.."_

_He leaned against a tree for support, feeling dizzy._

_Maggie took a step closer to him_.

_"It should have been you, Daryl. IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN YOU! HES GONE, FOREVER, AND YOU CAN NEVER BE HALF THE MAN HE WAS!"_

_Daryl sank against the tree trunk._

_"I know" Was all he could whisper. "_ _I know_ "

 

Daryl closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. 

Maggie had never told him that. But he almost wished she would. Her acceptance towards him was almost worse than if she had been angry.

The sun was beginning to come up from below the horizon, and he knew that he should get back inside the walls before anyone noticed his absence. 

He pushed himself to his feet and groaned, cracking his back.One would think that he'd be used to sleeping on the ground by now, but he continued to wake up feeling stiff every morning. 

Daryl climbed over the walls, and promptly ran into Rick. Damn his luck. 

Rick narrowed his eyes, regarding Daryl with a somewhat annoyed expression. 

"Daryl. What were you doing outside the walls so early?" He asked.

"Huntin." Daryl grunted.

It wasn't technically a lie, and he didn't want Rick to know he had been sleeping outside the walls. He wouldn't understand, and he would no doubt be angry if he ever found out. 

Rick looked skeptical, but didn't say say anything more about the matter. 

"So listen," He began, changing the subject, "I was actually coming to look for you. Michonne and I were going to go on a run today. We need stuff for the saviors, but the East wall is starting to collapse. We need to stay back and work on a solution. I need you to go on the run instead."

Daryl nodded.

"Sure. With who?" 

Rick hesitated.

"Jesus."

"No."

Daryl glared at Rick, disgusted he would even suggest such a thing. 

"Please." Rick begged. "I need you to do this." 

Daryl crossed his arms, drawing himself to his full height. 

"No. He's a Prick. I'll go with Aaron like usual."

Rick shook his head, annoyed. 

"Aaron's on guard duty, and I want you to be able to trust Jesus more. You two will work well together."

Daryl was about to bite out an insult, but before he could reply, a voice interjected. 

"Sorry to interrupt" Jesus said smoothly, walking out from behind the corner with a dazzling smile. "But walkers are about to break down the east wall, and woman are fainting in fear."

Rick rolled his eyes.

"Yeah. I know. I'm going to take care of it."

He turned to face Daryl, a 'no nonsense' kind of look on his face.

"Daryl. You're going."

Daryl glared, but Jesus only smiled wider, much to his annoyance.

"What, you aren't ecstatic to be working with yours truly?" He chirped, entirely all too enthusiastic. 

"No. Now get in the damn truck." Daryl snarled.

Rick could force him to work with Jesus, but he couldn't force him to like it. 

The day would only get worse before it got better.


	2. Chapter 2

Daryl drove in silence. Jesus kept shooting him sideways glances, and it was driving him insane. 

"What?" He finally snapped.

Jesus grinned, only infuriating him further.

"Oh.. nothing.." He replied, casually glancing down at his fingernails. 

Daryl let out a growl of frustration.

He started thinking about the night that Jesus had helped him escape from Negan.

He had been so broken that night, so terrified, and Jesus had seen him. Daryl had fallen asleep on the motorcycle, clinging to Jesus.

Jesus had seen him falling apart, and Daryl hated him for it.

Jesus's grin faded slightly as he took in Daryl's expression. 

"Something wrong?" 

"No." Daryl spat.

"Maybe we should talk..." Jesus began quietly. "About everything." 

"No." Daryl repeated.

"Fine." Jesus replied. "Have it your way. I'll just have to talk at you, since you don't want to talk back." 

Daryl scowled. 

"You know what I miss about the world before the dead took over? Soap operas. I would watch General Hospital every single night and it was amazing. I miss icecream. I miss-"

"Stop." Daryl growled. "I'm not here to get to know you. I'm here because Rick needs me to be here."

Jesus grabbed his heart dramatically.

"Oh.. the pain. The rejection. How must I live? I simply cannot go on."

Daryl clenched the wheel and was about to spit out an insult when they came across a bunch of trees laying in the middle of the road. Great. 

Jesus raised his eyebrows, and turned to face Daryl. 

"Road block?" He asked.

Daryl grunted in response and got out of the car.

The two men walked carefully around, weapons raised.

"We're going to have to go on foot if we want to go on. We can't get the car around this. I'll radio Rick and see what he wants to do." Jesus said.

Daryl leaned against a tree waiting for Jesus to talk to Rick.

Jesus returned to Daryl's side a few minutes later and said,

"Rick told us to go on. It might take a few days on foot, but we're desperate for supplies."

Daryl growled. A few days? 

"Whatever Rick needs." He muttered dejectedly. 

The two men walked together silently for awhile. Daryl was somewhat surprised by the other man's silence, but he didn't dare question it. 

It began to get unbearably hot out, and Daryl was desperate for a break. The sun beat down, and his hair fell into his face, sticky and wet.

Jesus looked annoyingly happy for how hot It was. He pulled a hair tie off his wrist and put his hair up in a bun. Daryl sneered.

"What?" Asked Jesus. "Did you want one?"

He held out a hair tie, and Daryl snorted.

"Nah."

They walked on for a few hours, not really finding much. They found a few cans of food here and there, but the trip was not much of a success. 

"It's getting dark." Jesus commented. "We should stop for the night."

Daryl nodded in agreement, not in the mood to say anything else. 

Once they found a small clearing, the two men laid out what little equipment they had, and Daryl began to make a fire. Jesus leaned against a log and watched him. It was beginning to make Daryl a bit uncomfortable. Out of all the people in Alexandria, why did he have to be with Jesus? His annoying chatter was sure to drive Daryl crazy, but his silence was almost worse.

Jesus was watching him intently, an odd look on his face. Daryl squirmed uncomfortably under his gaze. 

He eventually finished building the fire, and heaved a sigh of relief. They hardly seemed to need a fire in this heat, but it was comforting nonetheless.

He leaned back on a log a few feet away from Jesus, and the two sat in an awkward silence. 

Daryl eventually pulled out a cigarette, just to give his hands something to do. He stopped short after lighting it, as he almost had burned himself in front of Jesus, an old habit he had developed.

"You smoke?" He asked Jesus.

The silence was becoming more and more uncomfortable. Jesus was silent for a minute.

"Not really." He replied. "It'll kill you. But I'll make an exception tonight."

Daryl shrugged and passed him a cigarette. They sat quietly for a few minutes, but it didn't feel quite so awkward anymore. 

"What was your life like, before all this?" Jesus asked unexpectedly.

"Like hell im telling you." Daryl replied with a snort. 

Jesus sighed, wondering how he was going to get the other man to warm up to him. He eventually decided to share his own backstory before questioning Daryl about his own. 

"I thought my life was pretty terrible, you know?" He began.

"I was put in an orphanage at ten years old. I moved from family to family. There was one family I lived with, they were really terrible. There was a little girl a few years younger than me. Her name was Emily. The couple we lived with abused her. I loved her. She was my sister. The day I turned 18, I went to court and got custody over her. I worked stupid jobs here and there. I thought I could protect her. But when the outbreak happened... I lost her."

Daryl turned to stare at Jesus. He had never seen such a bitter look on his face.

"Well. I had a brother. I couldn't protect him much either." He mumbled.

Jesus smiled. 

"I knew I could get you to open up, Mr. Dixon."

Daryl glared and threw his cigarette at him.

"Prick."

Jesus laughed quietly.

"It was a true story though. Goodnight, Daryl." 

Daryl did not respond. 

The last thing he thought about was how much he hated that damn smile, and then he fell asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Daryl woke up not being able to breathe, as there was a dead weight laying on him. He blinked his eyes open groggily, and glanced down at his chest. 

What the hell? He shoved the body laying on top of him as hard as he could, and Jesus rolled off with an "oof!"

"What the fuck, Paul? Why were you on top of me?"

Jesus shrugged sheepishly.

"Sorry. I must've rolled over in my sleep of something."

Daryl glared and stood up, anxious to get moving again. The sooner this trip was over, the better, 

"Whatever." He muttered. "We should get moving. The sun will be up soon. And if I find you laying on me again, I'll kick your ass."

He didn't want to think about someone being so close to him while he slept.

Jesus laughed quietly, amused. 

"Yes sir."

They packed up camp and hit the road again. 

They walked for awhile, Jesus babbling on, Daryl half paying attention. They eventually came across an abandoned grocery store. It would have been a good find, except there were padlocks covering the doors.

Daryl swore in frustration, but Jesus simply smiled.

"Do you think it's raided already?" Jesus asked, eyeing the padlocks with curiosity. 

Daryl chewed his lip, thinking.

"Only one way to find out. We'll have to find a way to get in there." 

Jesus nodded.

"I can pick locks, but there's so many, it would take awhile. I think we should try the roof, I think I see an entrance."

Jesus didn't bother to wait for a response, much to Daryl's annoyance. He jumped on top of a nearby dumpster, then managed to climb onto the roof.

Stupid Ninja. He looked down at Daryl, who was trying hard not to look impressed.

"Common, I'll help you up." Jesus called.

Daryl sighed, and climbed onto the dumpster, wondering how on Earth he was going to get on top of the roof. 

After a moment of hesitation, he jumped and caught hold of Jesus's hands.

Jesus struggled a moment, but was able to pull him up. They both staggered for a moment, and Daryl fell into Jesus, knocking them both over onto the roof. Jesus felt the air get knocked out of him, but still managed to laugh.

"Hello, Mr. Dixon." he said quietly.

Daryl growled and rolled off of Jesus. What was wrong with this guy? Was he always so smug, so stupid? 

"You think you're-" He began, but then he stopped short.

A large cracking noise followed, his words, and the roof below them began to crumble. He glanced at Jesus, eyes wide with horror, just as the roof under Jesus fell apart. 

"Daryl!" Jesus yelled, falling through the ceiling. 

"Shit!" Daryl swore, rolling away from the hole.

He peered cautiously down into the hole. Jesus was laying still, unmoving. Daryl could see blood pooling around his head, and he could hear walkers coming from the distance. 

Shit, this was bad.

He took a deep breath. As much as he hated this prick, he knew that Rick liked him, and that Alexandria needed him.

Without hesitating, he jumped into the hole and landed roughly next to Jesus, in a pile of cement blocks.

He groaned loudly.

Shit, that hurt. Glancing up, he saw there were only three walkers coming their way.

That wasn't that bad, he could deal with three walkers.

Daryl pulled out his knife, staggered to his feet and disposed of them quickly.

He glanced over at Jesus, eyebrows furrowing in concern. God, was he even breathing? He knelt down next to Jesus and put an ear next to his chest. He breathed a sigh of relief as he heard a faint pulse. 

He was still alive.

Daryl brushed the cement off of Jesus and struggled to drag him out of the pile. Blood was pouring out from a gash in his forehead. It looked bad, but head wounds usually bled a lot, so it was hard to tell.

Daryl quickly took off his vest and t-shirt. He ripped the t-shirt into strips, and tied them around Jesus's forehead. He threw his vest back on and sighed.

Great, now he had to get BOTH of them out of this mess, and god only knew how many walkers were between him and the exit.

He cautiously poked his head around the door frame. There were about a dozen walkers walking aimlessly about. Well Crap. It could be better. Could be worse.

He pulled his knife out, preparing to fight his way to the exit. A walker shuffled towards him, and he sunk his knife into its head.

He waited for the walkers to come to him, and disposed of them one by one.

He was finally walking forward to kill the last one, when a weight slammed against him and threw him backwards.

A walker that he had failed to notice snapped at his neck, and he struggled to push is off. 

He ignored the pain in his leg and the panic he felt, and managed to kill the walker just before it was about to bite into his neck. He shoved the walker off him and killed it swiftly. 

He cringed as he tried to walk, pushing himself to his feet. With his first step, he crumbled to the ground and swore. Taking deep breaths, he pushed himself to his knees, then slowly stood up again and glanced around the room.

There were actually some useful looking supplies, thank god. 

He took off his backpack, and limped to the last remaining shelf.

There were a few cans of food, a pack of batteries, three containers of water bottles, and four flashlights. He shoved as much as he could into his backpack, and then went back for Jesus. He clenched his jaw as pain shot through his leg, but he continued to limp towards the room where Jesus was. 

Daryl stopped at the doorway and glanced at the unconscious man laying in front of him.

He took a deep breath, and convinced himself that he could do this. He had to, because he couldn't let Rick down.

Daryl bent down slowly, wincing.

He picked Jesus up, gritting his teeth in pain, stumbling against the wall before regaining his balance. He staggered towards the exit.

Jesus let out a small groan.

"Shut up before you get us both killed." Daryl hissed.

Jesus opened his eyes slowly.

"My head hurts." He complained.

Daryl didn't respond. He stumbled across the parking lot, and into the woods, where he promptly dropped Jesus.

"Ow!" Jesus protested.

Daryl fell to the ground next to him, cringing.

"Wasn't worth it." He panted, ignoring Jesus's protests. "Barely any supplies." 

Jesus stared at him.

"What?" Daryl snapped, feeling slightly uncomfortable under his gaze. 

"It's just...you saved me." He said quietly.

Daryl rolled his eyes.

"I had to. Rick wouldn't be happy if you were dead."

Jesus looked thoughtful for a moment. 

"I don't think that's the only reason why you saved me. Do you remember when we first met?" 

Daryl tensed, remembering dragging the unconscious man to Alexandria, and having him sleep on his shoulder in the car.

"Not really." He lied.

Lying was often easier than the truth. You just lie, because then you don't have to think about it.

Jesus chuckled.

"Well you saved me then too." He said. "One would think I'm starting to grow on you."

Daryl glared at the sky, ignoring the annoying man next to him, trying not to think about the painful throbbing in his leg.


	4. Chapter 4

"What exactly happened, anyway?" Jesus asked. "All I can remember is falling through the roof and feeling this pain in my head." 

Daryl sighed, and quickly explained what had happened. 

Jesus smirked.

"Well, that explains why you're not wearing a shirt."

His eyes raked up Daryl's chest.

Daryl turned away blushing and avoiding his gaze.

Prick.

"We should keep looking for supplies. Are you okay now?" He asked Jesus, coughing awkwardly. 

Jesus lifted a hand to his forehead, wincing a little. 

"Yeah, I'm fine." He replied, unconvincingly.

Daryl gave him a look, making it clear that he didn't buy the act Jesus was putting on. 

"Really, I've been through much worse." Jesus assured him. 

Daryl nodded, though still unconvinced, and went to stand up.

As soon as weight hit his injured leg, he toppled over, straight into Jesus.

Jesus gave Daryl a worried look as he struggled to help him stand upright again. 

"What happened to your leg? It looks broken."

Jesus reached out a hand to stabilize Daryl, who quickly pulled back.

"M'Fine." He spat. "A walker almost got me and I fell back, that's all."

Jesus shook his head.

"If you're sure you're okay..." 

"I said M'Fine!" Daryl snapped.

They walked on the rest of the day, both of them refusing to take a break. 

They managed to find a few guns and some amo, so apart from the injuries, it was a fairly successful day.

Jesus had been uncharacteristically quiet the past few minutes, something that made Daryl slightly uneasy. 

"That can't be good." Daryl thought. "He must be thinking about something."

And sure enough, a few minutes later, Jesus asked,

"Why did you save me, the first time we met?"

Daryl could feel Jesus's gaze on him, but refused make eye contact with him. He didn't want to see Jesus's bright blue questioning eyes looking at him.

"It was Rick's call." he muttered, looking at the ground. "I shoulda left you in the damn tree when I had the chance."

Jesus laughed quietly.

"Well, thank you. I appreciate you not leaving me in a tree. And I don't think you regret it, I really don't." 

He paused, and then added, "Can you tell me about your brother? It's just, I'm tired of talking at you. I want to know you."

Daryl glanced up sharply.

"No."

Jesus stopped walking.

"Please? You know how happy it would make Rick if we got along."

Daryl considered this for a minute. Rick was under so much stress, and he supposed Rick wanted him to trust Jesus for some reason.

"Fine." He mumbled. "My leg could use a break anyway." 

They sat down and Jesus pulled out a pack of cigarettes.

"Where'd you get those?" Daryl asked.

Jesus simply smirked.

"I have my ways, Mr. Dixon."

He passed the pack to Daryl, who quickly snatched a cigarette out of his hand. Ever since the apocalypse had started, he had been forced to cut back on his cigarette intake. It wasn't like that was a bad thing, but he still missed taking a smoke when he was stressed. 

They sat there smoking in silence for a few moments, when Daryl finally said, 

"His name was Merle. He was my older brother. I never... I never really had a family. My dad was... always in one of his moods. Drunk all the time. High, too. Merle always tried to get us out of the house I guess. We didn't really end up anywhere better, though. We hung around bars, doing nothing. Got drunk, got into fights, dropped outta school. He was always tryin to get me laid by some older chick. Not really the best life. He was an asshole, but  he turned out okay in the end I guess. But by then it was too late. He couldn't make up for all the shit he'd done."

Daryl jumped when he realized the cigarette he was holding was pressed deeply into his wrist. He closed his eyes, letting the pain take all the other emotions away.

"Daryl.. I-" Jesus started.

"No." Daryl said. "Forget it, I shouldn't have said anythin anyway."

He pushed himself to his feet, begining to limp forward, and Jesus reluctantly began to trail behind him.

It was a few hours before Jesus spoke again.

"Rick was telling me about a girl named Beth." He said quietly, uncertainly. 

Daryl froze in his tracks.

"Don't. Ever. Talk. About. Her. Again." He breathed.

"Look, I understand-" Jesus started, somewhat startled by Daryl's reaction. 

"I SAID DONT FUCKING TALK ABOUT HER!" He yelled.

He turned sharply away so Jesus couldn't see the tears threatening to gather behind his eyes.

Beth...

He missed her. A lot.

And Glenn, and Abraham...

It was his fault, all his fault.

"We're done." He snapped, angry at Jesus, angry at himself. "After tonight we're going back to Alexandria."

"Daryl, we haven't found anything yet." Jesus said quietly.

"I said we're done!" Daryl yelled.

They walked in a tense silence for the rest of the night.


	5. Chapter 5

Daryl woke up to find Jesus pressed against his side. Christ, couldn't this man sleep somewhere NOT on top of him? He had a whole damn forest to chose from.

Daryl shook his shoulder roughly.

"Get up." He said harshly.

Jesus's eyes fluttered open, and he smiled brightly. 

"Good morning, Mr. Dixon." He chirped, stretching with a yawn. 

Daryl growled.

"Don't call me that." He demanded. 

Jesus shrugged.

"As you wish. Do you still want to go back to Alexandria?"

"Yes."

Jesus looked almost... disappointed?

"Alright. Well, I should apologize. I shouldn't have pressed you like that yesterday. I know it's hard to talk about, and I... I'm just sorry."

Daryl grunted in response, and turned to limp back to Alexandria.

Jesus could apologize all he wanted, it didn't change a single god damn thing. 

 ***

When they returned to Alexandria, Rick was annoyed that they had returned so soon. 

"This is all you found?" He asked.

Jesus sighed.

"I'm afraid so."

Rick shook his head. 

"We'll have to make more runs later. For now, I'm just glad we fixed the wall."

Rick turned to face Jesus.

"You're going back to hilltop then?" He asked.

Jesus hesitated.

"Yes." He finally answered. 

Daryl let out a sigh of relief and turned to walk towards his house. He was exhausted, and ready to go home and sleep. He glared when Rick put out a hand to stop him from leaving. 

"Daryl. I need to talk to you for a minute. Alone."

Jesus took the hint, and started to back away. 

"I'll see you later, Rick. Daryl."

He gave a small wave, and then left. 

Rick looked at Daryl wearily. 

"What happened out there? You're back early."

Daryl shifted nervously. 

"Nothin. Just didn't find anythin much. Decided it was pointless."

Rick nodded slowly.

"Alright. Go rest. I think Michonne and I have a plan for Negan. We'll talk about it tomorrow."

Daryl walked slowly back to his all too perfect, all too normal, all too peaceful house.

 *******

Jesus walked through the woods quietly, thinking. He was on his way back to hilltop, where he would have to report to Maggie, and Gregory, he supposed.

Rick had asked him to go on the run with Daryl, and try to get closer with him. 

But he'd gone about it wrong.

He let out a frustrated sigh. He couldn't help the stupid things he thought, or said around Daryl. Something about him just threw him off. Ever since Daryl had escaped from the saviors, he had been different. More quiet, and more reserved, if that was even possible.

Jesus thought of the torture Daryl had gone through, and shuddered.

He felt a wave of nausea, then a wave of rage. 

He closed his hands into a tight fist, angry. How could someone do something so terrible? 

Jesus wished he could make everything better, he wished that he could somehow comfort Daryl.

But he couldn't, so he would go where he was wanted, at hilltop.


	6. Chapter 6

Jesus entered the gates to Hilltop, where he promptly ran into Maggie.

She grinned at him, delighted that he was back from his run. 

"How did it go at Alexandria?" She asked.

He shrugged.

"I went out on a run with Daryl. We didn't find much. I think Rick is coming up with a plan on how to defeat Negan, though. We should start getting ready."

Maggie smiled.

"I've been working on training everyone here. I think we'll be ready soon."

Jesus shifted on his feet, suddenly feeling very awkward. 

"Can I ask you something? About...um, Daryl?"

Maggie laughed.

"If you're wondering, yeah, I think he's gay."

"What?" Jesus sputtered. "No! That's not what I was going to ask.. I just- hey, wait a minute. Shouldn't you be resting? The baby should be here anytime now."

Maggie gave him a fake glare.

"I'm pregnant, not dying. I can help, you know. Besides, SOMEONE has to run this place."

She gave a sharp glare towards Gregory.

Jesus had to agree. Gregory was  a pretty terrible leader.

"Come on." Maggie said. "Let's go get some dinner, then you can tell me all about your adventures with Daryl." 

She winked, and started to walk towards the dining hall. 

Jesus sighed, then followed. Did Maggie really think he was into Daryl?

Sure, Daryl was attractive.

Great body. 

Fantastic arms.

It was fun to annoy him. It was easy to make him embarrassed.

But personality-wise... Jesus just didn't know.

He hoped that one day he could find out. Maybe they could end up being good for one another. 

 **** 

Daryl knocked on Rick's door, trying not to feel bitter about the rain that chilled him to the bone. Good lord, could Rick be any slower? 

Michonne came to the door, balancing Judith on her hip.

"Daryl!" She exclaimed happily. "Want to join us for dinner?"

Daryl hesitated.

"Nah. I was just lookin for Rick."

Rick finally came to the door, and Daryl breathed out a sigh of relief. 

"Daryl." He drawled. "What can I do for you?"

Daryl leaned against the porch railing.

"I was thinkin about going to the Kingdom, to visit Carol." He said.

Rick raised an eyebrow.

"We could really use you here, but...if you really want to go, and you make it quick, I suppose there isn't an issue."

Daryl nodded, happy with Rick's answer. 

"Thanks." He mumbled, and walked away without another word. 

Rick turned to Michonne.

"He seems different somehow, don't you think?"

Michonne looked concerned.

"Yeah." She replied. "I just don't know what's different yet."

 ****

Daryl and Carol sat on the floor in front of the fire in the small house outside the kingdom.

Daryl was laughing, something he hadn't done in awhile.

Carol's smile faded a little. 

"I've missed you." She said quietly.

Daryl nodded somewhat awkwardly. He was never one for touchy-feely kind of talks. 

"Yeah. Um, you too."

They sat quietly, enjoying each other's company for awhile, when Daryl said,

"Come back. Please. We're gonna fight Negan soon. We could use you. Alexandria misses you. I.. miss you"

Carol frowned.

"Daryl, we talked about this."

Daryl closed his eyes, thinking about Glenn, Abraham. Who else would have to die? He wanted Carol to be there next to him. He wanted to be able to protect her. 

"Please." He murmured, somewhat desperately. 

Carol looked at him carefully.

"I'll think about it."

 **** 

Rick grinned as soon he opened the gates to Alexandria.

"Carol." He greeted, happy she had decided to return. 

"Rick." she replied, somewhat stiffly. 

Rick glanced at Daryl, who appeared to be happy for the first time in the past few days. His smile widened. Good. Daryl was often too serious for his own good. 

"You're lucky you were gone." he informed Daryl. "The saviors came and tore this place apart. They're still looking for you."

Daryl cringed, feeling guilty that he was causing Alexandria trouble. 

Rick frowned. 

"Hey, Daryl. It's okay. I didn't mean to upset you. I just want you to know, so that you can be careful." 

Daryl was about to respond, but was interrupted by someone bursting through the front gates.

It was Jesus.

Daryl glared at him, his good mood instantly darkening. 

Jesus skipped through the gates, ignoring Daryl's sour look, and yelled,

"You have to come quick! Maggie is having her baby!"

Rick's face lit up, and Carol smiled.

"You guys go on. I can stay here and look after the place." Carol volunteered. 

Rick nodded gratefully.

"I'll go get the others, and tell them what's going on." 

Carol and Rick walked off, leaving Daryl and Jesus standing alone by the front gates.

"I know you're secretly excited." Jesus said with a smirk. 

Daryl said nothing. He wasn't in the mood to deal with the annoyingly happy man next to him. 

Jesus walked over and poked his arm. Daryl glared at him.

Jesus ignored him, and continued to babble on. 

"Well I'M excited! I can't wait! I love kids, they're so cute! And I know you secretly like them. I see how you get all soft around Judith and-"

Daryl interrupted.

"Stop."

Jesus smiled wider, if that was even possible.

Daryl hated that smile. 

"You're so easy to annoy." Jesus said, laughing quietly. 

 ******

Two hours later, Daryl cringed as he sat outside Maggie's door, listening to her screams.

Maggie...

Giving birth was hard enough not in the apocalypse. What would  happen if she died?

He didn't want to lose her...

Jesus had been ranting happily to him the past two hours while they waited. He stopped for a minute and looked at Daryl, suddenly realizing the other man's concern. 

"Hey..." he said gently, blue eyes going soft. "She'll be okay."

Daryl could only nod, not trusting himself to speak. 

Somehow, Jesus's words had made him feel a little better.

He hated it, but they did.

Jesus put a hand on his arm, and Daryl glared, shoving it off. 

Jesus sighed. 

"I know you secretly don't hate me." He said, smirking a little. 

Daryl shook his head, annoyed. Honestly, did this man ever shut up? 

"Shut it, Rovia." He muttered. 

Just then, the door opened. 

A lady that Daryl had never seen before walked out. 

"Its over! They're both fine. It's a girl!" She announced. 

Daryl felt relief wash over him. They were alright.

He got up, and slowly entered the room, feeling nervous.  

Maggie looked up and him and smiled, holding a bundle of blankets in her arms.

"Do you want to hold her?" She asked Daryl.

Daryl quickly shook his head no.

"Her... her name is Beth." She said quietly.

Daryl felt tears gather in his eyes.

"Beth?" He asked.

Maggie nodded, and passed the baby to him without asking this time.

Daryl stared at the small baby girl in his arms. 

"Beth..." He whispered. "You look just like your daddy."

He heard Maggie choke out a sob, and he tried to suppress the guilt he felt.  

Daryl stroked the baby's hair and made soothing sounds as she cried. 

He was vaguely aware of Jesus staring at him, but for the first time, he didn't care.


	7. Chapter 7

Everyone stood around Maggie, looking at Beth. 

"We should go." Rick announced. "Maggie needs to rest."

The group exited the room, and filed out into the hallway.

Rick turned to Jesus.

"Have you thought more about my offer?" He asked.

Daryl glanced up, curious.

Jesus took a deep breath, hesitating. 

"Yes. I have thought about it, and I think that it's a good idea."

Rick smiled.

"Perfect. You'll be a great addition to Alexandria."

Daryl froze. Oh no. No. He could NOT deal with this prick everyday.

"As a matter of fact, Daryl has a whole house to himself, I'm sure he wouldn't mind sharing a room with you."

Daryl snapped his head up. Rick smirked at him, and before Daryl could object, Jesus smiled and said,

"That would be wonderful, thank you."

Daryl scowled. His good mood from earlier was gone.

****

The group drove back to Alexandria.

Jesus chattered happily. He turned to Daryl. 

"Sleepover buddies! We can have pillow fights even, if you want." He whispered suggestively. 

Daryl thought he heard Rick snicker from the front seat.

"Fuck off." He muttered.

Jesus simply grinned.

Daryl heard Michonne whisper something to Rick, and they turned around to look at him and Jesus who sat the back seat.

For fucks sake.

*******

The group arrived safely back to Alexandria. Carol greeted them at the gate, and Daryl felt his scowl immediately melt away when he saw her. Without another word to the group, he went off silently to talk to her.

Jesus watched Daryl walk away with Carol. He felt something like... Jealousy? No, he wasn't jealous of Carol, or the relationship she had with Daryl.

Not at all.

He watched Carol put a hand on Daryl's arm, and Daryl smiled.

Okay. So maybe he was a littleeee jealous.

He wasn't sure exactly why he wanted to get to know Daryl better, but he did.

When Rick suggested that he move in with Daryl, he had wanted to say yes immediately, but he had to at least _pretend_ to think about it.

Well, one thing was for sure, living with Daryl would be interesting.

 ******

Daryl left Carol's porch, and walked back to his house.

The first thing he saw when he opened the door was Jesus sitting on the couch, grinning at him.

Shit.

He groaned internally. He had almost forgotten about Jesus.

"Hello!" Jesus said brightly.

Daryl grunted in response.

"Listen." Jesus started. "I know you're not exactly happy about me staying here, so I got you something."

He pulled out a pack of cigarettes and a bottle of whisky from behind his back.

Daryl eyed them curiously, then he nodded slowly. A peace offering. A good one, at that. 

"Yeah. Well. Thanks." he managed to say.

He sat down on the far side of the couch, as far away from the other man as possible.

Jesus held the bottle of whisky out towards him.

He reached out and grabbed it, then took a few gulps.

It wasn't bad. He handed it back, and Jesus took a swig from the bottle, sighing in contentment as warmth flooded through his chest.

They sat there in silence for awhile, sharing a drink.

Daryl suddenly became aware of the fact that Jesus staring at him, an intent look on his face. 

"What?" He asked, but he didn't snap it like usual.

"Nothingg.." Jesus slurred.

Daryl fought the urge to laugh.

"Are you tipsy already, you light weight?"

He didn't know why he was amused instead of annoyed. He felt a slight, warm buzz. Jesus looked mocked offended.

"Mr. Dixon. I am NOT a light weight. I could out-drink you any day."

He gave a lopsided smile and leaned back against the couch.

Daryl snorted.

"Yeah?"

He grabbed the whisky from Jesus's hand and chugged the rest of the bottle.

Jesus held his hands up in mock surrender. 

"Alright, alright. You win."

They sat in silence again for a few minutes.

"So. Carol." Jesus said after awhile.

Daryl glanced up. 

"What about her?"

Jesus made a heart shape with his hands.

"You a couple?"

Daryl snorted.

"Nah."

There was another beat of silence.

"You?" Daryl asked. "You gotta girlfriend?"

Jesus laughed.

"I used to have a boyfriend, Alex. We broke up."

Daryl stiffened a little. 

"Oh."

Jesus's smile faded.

"Sorry. I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable or anything, with me being....gay I guess."

Daryl shook his head.

"Ain't uncomfortable." he replied.

Though, to be honest, he was a bit uncomfortable.

He knew his father or brother would have been appalled. He cringed just thinking about it.

Jesus eyed him carefully.

"What are you thinking about?"

Daryl glared at him, but for some reason, he decided to tell him. Maybe it was the whisky, but he felt comfortable.

"I was thinkin...Bout my dad. And brother. I told you a lil bout them. I was thinking, my dad would kick my ass if he knew I was talking to you. Super homophobic and racist. He was an asshole, just like Merle." 

Jesus nodded slowly. He shifted closer to Daryl.

"I'm sorry... about your dad and all that."

Daryl stiffened.

"Ain't a big deal." He replied.

Jesus sighed.

"I'm going to get some water. You need anything?"

Daryl shook his head no. 

Jesus went to stand up, but stumbled, and fell over.

Daryl tensed as Jesus fell onto his lap. 

His nose was right next to Jesus's long hair, and god, it smelled so good. It smelled.... fruity? 

What? No. He didn't just think that.

Why wasn't Jesus moving?

Jesus slowly lifted his head and met Daryl's eyes.

Daryl's breath caught as he stared into Jesus's blue eyes.

Jesus licked his lips.

Daryl quickly shoved him off his lap, heart pounding. 

"Daryl, I-" Jesus started.

"You're drunk." Daryl grumbled. "Its fine. I'll show you to your room."

 ****

Jesus laid in the room next to Daryl's.

He could hear Daryl pacing, and he sighed.

Daryl gave him such mixed signals.

The way he had looked into his eyes...

No. Daryl was not interested in him like that. Hell, he didn't even know if he was interested in Daryl.

Sure, he thought about him... a lot. What gay guy WOULDNT look at Daryl, though? It was probably just a small crush.

He closed his eyes. Yes, that was it. Just a crush. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Jesus sings in this chapter is "Banana Pancakes" by Jack Johnson.

Daryl had slept poorly that night. He woke up to quiet singing and clatters coming from the kitchen.

He groaned, and slowly pulled himself out of bed.

He had a slight headache from last night, and his hair was matted to his forehead.

When was the last time he had showered? He couldn't remember.

Guess that was a sign he probably should. It might help with his headache anyway.

He got in the hot shower, trying to ignore the way that Jesus sang and danced around the kitchen downstairs. 

******

Jesus sang quietly in the kitchen while he made pancakes. He didn't know if Daryl liked pancakes, but if he didn't, hell. More for him.

He sang,

"Make you banana pancakes, pretend like it's the weekend now. Can't you see that it's just raining? There ain't no need to go outside."

It was a fitting song, since it was indeed raining. Jesus jumped as he heard the floorboard shift behind him.

He turned to see Daryl, leaning against the doorframe.

How long had he been standing there?

Daryl looked slightly embarrassed, and looked at the ground. 

"Hey." He said.

Jesus smiled brightly.

"Good morning! I made pancakes. I didn't know if you like them but.." 

Daryl interrupted.

"I like em. Thanks"

The two men ate in silence. Jesus froze when he looked up to see Daryl watching him intently. He looked.. different. Hair combed and soft. Clean.

He grinned.

"You finally decided to shower!"He chirped.

Daryl frowned, but didn't say anything.

"Rovia I'm-" Daryl started, but Jesus cut him off.

"Call me Paul." he blurted.

What? No one called him Paul.

Daryl raised an eyebrow.

"Paul." He repeated slowly.

The way he said it made Jesus shiver.

"Yes, Daryl?" 

Daryl tensed a little.

"I was wonderin. I'm going huntin, and would you... umm.."

He looked kind of helpless, Jesus thought. It was kind of adorable.

Jesus smiled.

"Yes. I'd love to go with you, if that's what you're asking?"

Daryl nodded.

 

*******

 

The two men where about to leave Alexandria. Much to Daryl's dismay, Rick saw them leaving together and smirked.

Once they were out of Alexandria, they walked through the woods. Daryl glanced over at Jesus, who appeared to be deep in thought. He was stomping kind of loudly, which surprised Daryl. Jesus was usually quiet, at least when he walked. 

"Hey, asshole. You're gonna scare away all the game for miles if you keep it up." He grunted.

Jesus jumped.

"Yeah, sorry." He mumbled.

What was up with this guy? He usually talked nonstop. Not that Daryl minded the silence.

He quietly put a hand up to stop Jesus when he spotted a squirrel.

Daryl silently drew his bow back and fired.

The arrow hit the squirrel right in the eye, and it fell out of the tree.

Jesus let out a low whistle, and Daryl smirked.

They went on like this for awhile, Jesus quiet and intent, watching, while Daryl took down squirrel after squirrel.

"Lets head back." Daryl suggested after awhile.

Jesus only nodded, looking a bit distracted.

Daryl sighed. The silence was starting to get to him.

****

 

When they arrived back to the house, Daryl skinned and cleaned the squirrels while Jesus showered.

Daryl walked upstairs to change after he finished cleaning the squirrels. There was blood splattered all over his clothes, and he grimaced. Not that he minded the blood, but Jesus might.

Wait.

Since when did he care what Jesus thought?

He stripped off his t-shirt, forgetting to close the door.

As Daryl was changing, he heard a startled gasp behind him. He spun around to see Jesus with only a towel around his waist, long hair wet and dripping down his back.

Jesus's eyes were wide and his face went pale. It took Daryl a moment to realize what Jesus was staring at.

Then it dawned on him. Jesus had seen his back. He had seen the scars.

Daryl's eyes narrowed.

"Daryl..." Jesus started.

"Get out." He snapped.

Jesus shook his head, but walked away silently. Daryl slipped on a new shirt, not wanting to think about the scars littered across his back.

He stomped downstairs, and walked out of the house, deciding he needed to take a walk. It was sunset. Good. He wanted some time alone in the dark.

Jesus watched Daryl leave the house through the front window.

He sighed, frustrated. 

He knew Daryl was upset. He could only guess where all the scars had come from. He shuddered. To think of someone hurting Daryl... it made him furious. And Daryl was obviously selfconscious of his scars. Jesus thought they were... sexy. Not that he wanted Daryl to get hurt. No. But they weren't something to be ashamed of. His mind wandered to Daryl. Blue eyes. Toned arms. Great body. He sighed. None of it mattered, because Daryl hated him.

 *******

Daryl came back to Alexandria a few hours after sundown. He jumped when a door opened and someone called,

"Daryl!"

He glanced up. It was Aaron. Daryl walked slowly to Aaron and Eric's front porch.

"Come in!" Aaron said with a smile. "We made pasta..."

Daryl was about to object. He should object. But he didn't want to face Jesus yet, so he decided to join them. 

The three men sat around the table eating, making awkward small talk. They were mostly taking about Negans demise and whatnot.

"So." Eric said. "We heard you got a new room mate!"

Aaron kicked him under the table, but he smiled as well.

"Yep." Daryl grunted.

"And?" Eric asked. 

"S'Fine." he said, not really in the mood to talk. 

Eric and Aaron exchanged a long look.

For the love of god. What was it with all these looks lately?

The three men finished eating the rest of their dinner in silence.  

"I should go. It's gettin late."  Daryl mumbled, after a long awkward silence. 

Aaron and Eric simply nodded, though they were somewhat worried about him. 

He said goodbye to Aaron and Eric, and walked back to his house as slowly as possible.

He opened the front door to see Jesus sitting on the living room couch. He glared, feeling extreamly weary. 

"What are you doin awake?" Daryl asked. 

It was around 11, and he expected Jesus to be asleep by now. 

Jesus sighed.

"I was waiting for you."

Daryl growled.

"I don't need yer pity."

"I know." Jesus began wearily. "Look, let's pretend I didn't see anything, if that's what you want."

Daryl hesitated. He didn't want to have to be angry all the time, so perhaps it would be easier to just pretend...

"Fine. Why'd you wait for me anyway?" He asked, pretending to be okay with this arrangement.

He could pretend that everything was fine, but it wasn't. 

"I um... I wanted to make sure you were okay." Jesus said with a small smile.

Daryl's heart skipped a beat, much to his annoyance.

When was the last time someone had said something like that to him?

He didn't say anything, and Jesus put his hand on his arm, concerned. 

"Are you okay?" He whispered.

Daryl felt hot. He flushed a little. He couldn't move. He shrugged Jesus's hand off, taking a few deep breaths. 

"Go to bed." He finally spat out, avoiding the question. "S late."

Jesus was still worried, but he covered it with a smirk. 

"Goodnight, Mr. Dixon."

 ******

Daryl woke in the middle of the night, screaming.

The nightmares, they were awful.  

Glenn. Beth. Abraham. Gone.

He shuddered.

Jesus flung the door open upon hearing Daryl's screams. 

"Daryl." He breathed.

"M'Fine." Daryl rasped.

Jesus nodded slowly and was about to shut the door, when Daryl stopped him.

"Wait."

He didn't know what had made him say it.

No, that was a lie. He knew why he had said it. 

On this particular night, Jesus had also been in his nightmares, and he needed to be reminded that it wasn't real. But only for tonight.


	9. Chapter 9

Jesus stopped.

"What?" He asked.

"I... umm... Stay?" Daryl asked.

Jesus nodded, surprised. He sat down cautiously on the edge of the bed.

"I have the dreams too." Jesus whispered.

Daryl really did look bad. Shaking. Sweating. Pale. Daryl took a deep, shuddering breath.

"I had a dream...where everyone was dying. And you were there too.. and-" he broke off.

Jesus froze. Me? He thought.

He reached out slowly and absentmindedly brushed the hair out of Daryl's eyes.

"It's okay." He soothed, when Daryl tensed.

Daryl relaxed after a few minutes, and was soon asleep.

Jesus knew he should probably go back to his own bed, but this might be the only time he got to be so close to Daryl.

He smirked, and decided to lay next to the older man.

Both Jesus and Daryl slept better that night then either of them had in months.

 ****

Daryl woke up to Jesus snoring peacefully against him. Damnit.

That hasn't been a dream. That had happened.

He was an idiot.

He rolled out of bed and looked at Jesus. He realized for the first time that Jesus wasn't wearing a shirt. His eyes traveled up Jesus's chest, and he jumped when Jesus purred,

"Like what you see?"

He glared, trying to come up with an excuse. He couldn't.

"Asshole." He finally muttered.

Jesus laughed. It was a nice sound, he thought, then immediately tensed.

"I'm goin huntin." He announced abruptly. 

He needed to get out of the house before he went insane. 

Jesus's smile faded. 

"Are you okay?" He asked. 

"Yeah. M'fine."

"Alright. Just be careful out there, okay?" 

"Yeah."

Daryl left without another word.  

 He was walking towards the front   gates when Rick stopped him.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

"To Carol's. Then hunting."

Jesus had put him in a semi-bad mood, and he wasn't even really sure why. 

Rick shook his head.

"You can see Carol. But the hunt will have to wait. I need you to go on another run."

Daryl glared.

"Why?"

"Because we need supplies, obviously." 

"Alright. Fine." 

He didn't dare ask with who. He hoped it would be Aaron. Or Rick. Or Rosita. Or-

"I think you should go with Jesus again." 

Shit. It was bad enough he had to live with him. He already saw that prick everyday. 

Rick sighed.

"Why are you so against this guy?" He asked. "Do you know how much he's done for us? You need to be nice."

Daryl didn't say anything, he simply glared and walked to Carol's house, ignoring Rick completely. 

He stormed through the front door without knocking. Carol didn't even glance up from the book she was reading.

"Good morning Daryl." She greeted, calmly taking a sip of tea. 

Daryl grunted in response.

"I hear you're going on a run later?" She asked.

Daryl nodded, a bitter look on his face. 

Carol smiled.

"Bring me back something good, will you?"

Daryl sighed, feeling his anger beginning to melt away. 

"I hate leavin you." He admitted. 

Carol gave him a long look.

"I'll be fine. But I'm worried about you, Daryl. You've been so... different, lately. Is this about Glenn? Or are you still upset about Jesus moving in?"

Daryl flinched when she said his name.

"So this is about Jesus." She said slowly.

"It ain't." He retorted.

"You know what I think? I think he's starting to grow on you, and you don't like that. You don't want to get close to anyone else, someone you might lose. But Daryl, you can't think that way, it's not okay. You can let him-"

Daryl turned around.

"I think Rick needs me." He said, voice low. 

Perhaps Carol's words had hit a little too close to home. 

 ****

Daryl and Jesus sat in a large white moving truck.

Daryl was driving, as he always did. They were out on another run, courtesy of Rick.

After a half an hour of driving,  they arrived at an abandoned grocery store.

The two men entered the store, weapons raised.

"Don't fall through the roof this time." Daryl muttered, surprising himself.

Jesus simply laughed.

"It's okay. I know you'd save me again." 

He gave Daryl a bright smile and a wink. 

Daryl blushed slightly, and hated himself for it.

They scanned the isles quickly.

Daryl found some instant oatmeal, and knew Carol would like it to make cookies. He shoved it in his backpack and continued on.

Jesus stopped, picked something up, and  whistled as he held up a box of condoms.

"Woooo. Go on Daryl. Take them. You'll need them for all the ladies pining after you."

He threw the box at Daryl, who didn't catch them. They simply bounced off his chest.

Jesus raised an eyebrow.

"Or not..."

Daryl didn't move. He was too busy thinking. Too engrossed in thought.

There _were_ ladies at Alexandria who had said they were into him.

Also, why hadn't he gotten with Carol yet? She was certainly beautiful, and a great person. More of a friend though, he supposed. 

He had never really thought about sex all that often.

Even when Merle and his father had tried their damndest to get him to think about it.

"I don't think I'm into women." he accidentally muttered out loud. 

Both men froze, staring at each other with wide eyes. 

Shit.  _Shit._  He did not just admit that out loud. 

"Oh." Jesus said casually, beginning to relax. "Well, in that case, take them for all the men pining after you."

He winked.

Daryl immediately became defensive. 

"Shut it, Rovia."

Jesus laughed.

"Oh, how my heart hurts when you say things like that."

 **** 

At the end of the day, the load wasn't half bad, Jesus thought.

A few guns. Some canned food. No injuries.

Oh. And Daryl had admitted he wasn't into women.

He grinned just thinking of the possibilities.

"Hey, Daryl?" He asked.

Daryl glanced up.

"What?" He snapped.

Jesus tried to hide his amusement. It was so easy to annoy him.

"Could you teach me how to hunt?"

Daryl looked surprised, then grimaced. 

"Hell no."

Jesus thought for a minute.

"I could teach you how to fight, in exchange. It would be good for both of us."

Daryl snorted.

"Ain't need you to show me how to fight."

Jesus smirked.

"Oh yeah?" 

 In an instant, he had Daryl pinned up against a tree, struggling to get out of his grip.

Daryl let out a low growl.

"Fine. I'll teach you. Let me go."

Jesus let him go with a grin.

Daryl rubbed his wrist, frowning. 

"Did I hurt you?" Jesus asked, suddenly concerned.

"No." Daryl spat, refusing to give Jesus the satisfaction of an injury. 

 

 ****

Daryl bent next to Jesus. He was begining to teach the younger man how to hunt. 

"So you see," he said, pointing to a knot in the rope. "That's how you make a trap."

Jesus nodded, pretending to be paying attention.

"Yes, that's brilliant."

Jesus had been watching Daryl, instead of the rope. The way his fingers moved, the way he bit his lip in concentration, the way his hair fell over his eyes-

"Rovia!" Daryl barked.

Jesus started.

"Sorry, what?" 

"I asked if you wanted to try the bow."

Jesus's face lit up. 

"Yes, of course! I was just thinking about the wonderful trap you showed me."

Daryl rolled his eyes.

A few minutes later, they stood in front of a tree, with a makeshift target that Daryl had carved into it.

Jesus held Daryl's crossbow, and pointed it towards the tree, not really knowing what he was doing.

Taking a deep breath, he let go of the Arrow, and watched it soar past the tree.

Daryl chuckled in amusement.

Jesus didn't think he had ever heard Daryl laugh before. It was low, and rough.

He loved it.

Daryl came up from behind him, still laughing. 

"You're holding it wrong." He said quietly.

Daryl put his calloused hands over Jesus's small soft ones, and adjusted them accordingly.

He lingered for a moment, then stepped back.

"Okay. Try it now." 

Jesus fired the arrow. It hit a few feet above the target, but at least hit the tree.

Daryl looked a little smug.

"See?" He asked.

"Hmm.." Jesus began. "Not exactly. Could you maybe, ah, press your body against mine and show me again?"

Daryl blushed slightly.

"Prick." He muttered.

"Yeah, I know. But now it's time for me to help you...." 

**** 

They sat down on a log, watching the fire flicker, Listening to the crackling of wood. 

Jesus pulled a bottle of Whisky out from under his trench coat. 

Daryl wondered how he'd been hiding it there for so long. 

"What do you say, Mr. Dixon, a drink?" Jesus asked. 

Daryl shrugged. Sure. What the hell.   

They drank for awhile, and there was that warm buzz again.

Jesus smiled at him, a lopsided, tipsy smile.

Daryl felt himself smile back.

They talked about nothing for a few hours. It was something Daryl hadn't done in forever.

Not since Beth had died...

"You know, um, Paul. You're okay." He said. 

He wasn't sure why he said it. Maybe because in that moment, Paul reminded him of Beth.

He missed her terribly... 

Jesus still had that lazy smile on his face.

"Daryl." He slurred. "You're more than okay."

Their eyes locked.

Daryl's heart skipped a beat. Jesus leaned in and...

Daryl leaned back.

He cleared his throat.

"We should get to bed." He suggested. 

Did he imagine disappointment flicker in Jesus's eyes? Maybe not disappointment, but it was definitely something. 

But just like that, it disappeared, and Jesus smiled again. 

"You're right." He agreed, placing a hand on Daryl's knee briefly.

"Goodnight, Daryl."


	10. Chapter 10

Daryl woke up, and of course, Jesus was fucking laying on him again.

Daryl was too tired to even feel angry, as he felt incredibly sore. Jesus had shown him some fighting tips after he'd shown him how to hunt, and god, he was feeling it this morning. 

He shoved Jesus off with a groan, and Jesus woke up.

"Sorry..." he apologized groggily.

"S'fine." Daryl grunted.

Jesus watched Daryl as he rubbed his sore shoulder, and he felt a flash of guilt. 

"I should have had you stretch first yesterday. I forgot. Sorry about that."

Daryl said noting.

The two men lay next to each other, looking up at the still dark sky.

"We should visit Beth, when we get back." Jesus suggested unexpectedly.

Daryl tensed at the name. He still wasn't used to it yet.

"Yeah." He replied. 

He could feel Jesus's eyes on him, and he sighed.

"Beth was Maggie's sister." he started to explain.

Jesus nodded. Of course he already knew. He and Maggie were practically best friends now.

"And Beth was...I don't know. She was great. I loved her. She was bright. Positive. Thoughtful. Everything I'm not." He said quietly.

Jesus put a hand on Daryl's arm.

"You don't have to tell me, if you don't want to." He whispered.

Daryl shrugged his hand off.

"Want to." He murmured, voice cracking with emotion. 

He didn't know why, but he did want to tell Jesus.

"She died, and I felt like it was my fault. After losing her, I never want to lose someone again."

He blinked, feeling tears arise. Damnit. He would not cry. 

"How did she die?" Jesus asked gently. 

"We were at Grady Memorial hospital. It was an accident. She was... shot. It was partly my fault." 

Daryl looked incredibly distraught, and Jesus decided not to pry any further. 

Daryl would talk to him about it when he was ready. 

"Thanks for feeling like you could tell me." he whispered. 

 ****

"It looks like a pharmacy, up ahead." Jesus called.

The two men had been driving for a few hours now.

Daryl pulled over, turned off the truck, and they got out, beginning to look around. 

Sure enough, it was a pharmacy.

Jesus glanced at the lock on the door. 

"I could try the roof?" He suggested with a laugh.

Daryl scowled.

"Oh no you don't."

"It's a joke, Daryl. Lighten up a little."

Jesus bent down and began working intently, tongue poking out of his mouth as he prodded at the lock. 

Daryl watched him in fascination as the lock popped off.

Jesus held the door open, looking proud of himself. 

"After you, Mr. Dixon." He grinned.

Daryl rolled his eyes, but didn't say anything.

The pharmacy appeared empty, of both medicine and walkers.

Daryl and Jesus wandered off in opposite directions, looking for supplies. 

Daryl turned sharply as he heard a snarl, a noise of surprise, a yelp, and then a thump.

A walker had bumped into Jesus, and was now snapping at his shoulder.

Daryl froze for a minute, his brain refusing to work. He could only stare in horror as Jesus struggled against the walker, pushing its head back, blood and guts falling over him.

"Daryl." he gasped. "Help..."

Daryl suddenly became alert.

He pulled out his knife, and struck the walker's skull, cringing as the rotten skull collapsed.

To his annoyance, he realized that his hands were shaking.

Jesus looked up, eyes wide.

"Daryl, I think I might have gotten bit..." 

"What?"

Jesus looked scared.

"I'm not sure... my shoulder hurts. It might just be a cut. It's ... it's probably fine."

Daryl held his arm out.

"Let me see." He rasped.

Jesus pulled down his shirt to reveal his shoulder. It was covered in blood and guts. Shit.

"I can't tell." He whispered. "Fuck."

Daryl leaned against the wall His face fell into his hands.

"Damn Paul, it's my fault, I froze and-"

Jesus's head snapped up. He looked annoyed.

"It is _not_ your fault." He stated firmly. 

Another death. Another death, and it was all Daryl's fault...

Jesus took Daryl's hand and closed his eyes.

"You need to stop blaming yourself for these things, Daryl." 

Daryl made a distressed noise, and quickly looked away. 

The two men sat in tense silence for a moment. 

"How long do we wait? Before we decide if I'm okay?" Jesus asked, breaking the silence.  

Daryl paused.

"Maybe an hour. I'm not sure. Have you noticed that different people turn at different rates? I've seen someone take as long as 24 hours. But they all knew for sure that they were bitten..." 

Jesus nodded slowly, thinking. 

Yes, now that he was thinking about it, people did seem to turn at different rates. 

The men sat there quietly, neither of them wanting to talk. Neither of them wanting to acknowledge the problem at hand.

Jesus glanced up.

"I want to tell you something, Daryl. In case.. in case I do turn."

Daryl closed his eyes.

Fuck. He didn't think that the thought of this pricks death would hit him so hard.

"You know, Maggie loves you. She doesn't blame you. Not for Glenn's death, not for anything. Part of the reason she named the baby Beth was for you. No one blames you, Daryl. Carol, Rick, Carl, Michonne. They're your family. And they love you, I can tell. And I..."

Jesus hesitated.

"I think you're a good man, Daryl." He finished.

That had not been what he wanted to say. But he couldn't say what he wanted to say.

Not yet.

Daryl said nothing for a long moment. 

"Get in the truck, Rovia." He finally said. "You're gonna be fine." 

Jesus sighed.

It was too soon to tell yet, but he wanted to believe that he would be okay, almost as much as Daryl did.

They had been driving for a few hours when Daryl let out a breath.

"You're okay."

Jesus smiled a little.

"I am."

*** 

They were at the gates of Alexandria by nightfall. 

All they had found from the pharmacy was Advil, but it was still better than nothing.

Rick eyed the stash. 

Daryl wondered if Rick would be upset they had found so little, but he appeared to be content. 

"Good." Rick praised. "Now both of you, get some rest. Tomorrow is the day we act against the saviors." 

 **** 

As hard as Daryl tried to sleep, he couldn't. He eventually gave up and went to sit on the front porch.

Tomorrow was it. He could kill Dwight.

That was all he could think about,  killing Dwight.

He pulled out a cigarette , thinking of the torture he would bring upon the other man.

The door creaked opened slowly from behind him.

"Sorry." Jesus apologized. "I didn't know you were out here. I couldn't sleep either."

Daryl shrugged and flicked a hand, showing he didn't care if Jesus sat next to him.

Jesus plopped down next to him, and Daryl handed him a cigarette.

Jesus hesitated, but took it.

They sat in silence for awhile.

"A lot of people are going to die tomorrow." Jesus stated.

"Yeah." Daryl agreed.

"Fucking sucks." Jesus muttered.

Daryl looked up in surprise. Jesus didn't swear often, or look so serious.

"You, though? You'll be fine. You're a survivor. You'll outlive us all." Jesus said, taking a slow drag from his cigarette. 

Daryl looked down at the ground, feeling suddenly anxious. 

"That's what I'm afraid of." He whispered.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A longer chapter from Kate!!! She's loving the comments, so keep that up lol.

Daryl woke up to pounding on his door. He blinked the sleep out of his eyes.

He had gotten maybe... 2 hours of sleep?

The knocking grew louder, and he rolled out of bed, groaning.

On his way to the front door, he saw Jesus sprawled across the couch, snoring loudly.

He smirked.

The Bastard could probably sleep through a walker biting his head off, from the sound of it.

Daryl answered the door, to see Rick standing there, looking utterly exhausted.

Large, black circles hung under his eyes.

He glanced around the door at Jesus.

"Wake him up." He commanded.  "We're moving. Meet me at the gates in ten."

He walked away before Daryl had the chance to respond.

Daryl turned to glance at Jesus, almost feeling bad about having to wake the other man up. 

"Rovia!" He snapped.

The snores continued.

Daryl called his name a few more times before sighing.

For the love of god.

He bent next to the couch, and shook the younger man's shoulders, feeling annoyed. He made sure not to shake him gently. 

Jesus continued to snore. 

"For fucks sake. PAUL." He muttered, continuing to shake him. 

Jesus groaned, and blinked. His large blue eyes open slowly.

"Get up, Rovia. We're moving."

Jesus frowned.

"Now?"

Daryl nodded in confirmation.

"Now." 

******

They met Rick at the front gates. He looked solemn, and talked to Michonne in a low voice.

A large group was gathered around him.

Daryl made eye contact with Carol across the crowd.

She smiled.

Daryl could read that smile, what it meant. It wasn't a happy smile. It was a borderline psychotic smile, laced with hate and revenge.

A shiver raced down his spine. God help anyone who got in Carol's way. 

"Listen up!" Rick called.

"The Saviors will be here any minute! We've planned for this! As you can see, people from both the Kingdom and Hilltop are here! Our MAIN goal is to take out Negan, by any means possible. Without Negan, the saviors crumble. I can only hope that we will have few causalities. Please be careful out there. With any luck, we will come out of this war successful!"

A few cheers greeted his speech, but people looked mostly terrified.

Daryl looked around at the large group of people, wondering who he would see alive after this war, wondering who would survive.  

How many people would have to die?

He glanced around, and his eyes met Jesus's. He gave the man a nod, and continued to listen to Ricks plan.

It was simple enough.

In fact, more simple than Daryl would have liked. It was nothing more than an ambush really. It could go so badly. Daryl thought of all the things Negan would do if they lost in their retaliation. He would make them suffer a fate worse than death. He would torture them. All of them.

Daryl snapped from his thoughts and back to Ricks voice.

"Alright! Everyone get in position. Daryl, you need to hide somewhere until the fighting begins!"

Daryl growled. He was NOT going to just stand by. Rick saw the look on his face, and gave him a weary glance. 

"Daryl." He said softly. "I need you to do this."

He sighed, but nodded.

He was such a sucker for Rick. Far too loyal, he thought. But he stalked away into a random garage anyway, and he waited.

Daryl watched everyone move out, and noted that they all seemed to know exactly where they were going.

When did Rick plan all this?

He supposed it didn't matter now.

He watched Carol tensely. She glanced at his hiding spot worriedly, but then that smile took over her face again. When she smiled, Daryl knew she'd be okay. 

He started when he saw Maggie, standing close to Rick. What was she doing here? She should be resting.

But of course, she was here, too stubborn for her own good.

She slipped next to Daryl silently.

Daryl said nothing, and closed his eyes as a wave of nausea hit him.

Maggie squeezed his hand gently.

She had a fierce look in her eyes.

"We WILL win this" she said, quietly, intently.

Daryl choked up a little, seeing her determination and strength. 

It was more than he had. 

"Yeah." He rasped. "We will." 

He only wished he could believe that. 

 

******

Daryl watched the saviors pull through the front gates. They moved slowly and lazily, as if they didn't have a damn care in the world.

"Rick!" Negan sang out. "What supplies do you have for me this week?"

Rick looked down, refusing to make eye contact, refusing to give anything away. 

"We're going to give you everything we can spare." He muttered.

Negan's smile grew.

"Ohhh it better be enough, Rick! Because Lucille is just DYING for some blood and flesh."

Daryl wanted to take the bastard down himself, but he didn't dare move.

Rick looked up and smiled slightly.

"Oh, It should be more than enough."

Rick held up two fingers. That was the signal. 

A large group of people with guns stepped out and surrounded the saviors.

Negan laughed.

"Oh Rick! I really didn't think you had it in you! I THOUGHT we had come to an agreement."

He began to look angry.

"I'll give you one chance Rick, one chance to back down."

There was silence. Tension hung in the air. Maggie drew in a sharp breath next to him.

"No." Rick spat.

And then there was chaos. Shots fired.

The saviors were hopelessly outnumbered, but they still had an advantage.

Fear.

Daryl growled in frustration. They were outnumbered 3 to 1 for every man, yet the saviors might still win, all because of fear.

Negan was swinging Lucille now, a murderous smile on his face. He looked at Rick and laughed.

"I will kill everyone you love. I will torture them, until they BEG for death!"

Rick did not flinch.

Daryl looked down at Maggie, whose face was pale. She looked terrified and furious all at once. 

Blood splattered as the saviors fought back.

Daryl was about to join the fight, when he noticed Dwight, who was sneaking away behind some houses.

Daryl let out a growl. That fucking coward.

He was charging at Dwight, knife in hand, before Maggie could stop him.

No one noticed him, as they were all a bit preoccupied.

Daryl crashed into Dwight from behind, and both of them went sprawling across the ground.

Daryl noticed Dwight wore his vest. That only made his fury grow.

"YOU BASTARD!"

He was screaming, panting, ripping the vest off and throwing it to the ground next to him.

Dwight did not fight. His eyes were wide and terrified, but he did not struggle. Daryl began close his hands around Dwight's throat.

"I WILL kill you." He snarled.

Dwight looked dejected. Tired.

"Do it already." He whispered, half choking.

Daryl lifted his knife. He was going to make this as painful as possible. Dwight had killed Denise. He had _tortured_  people. He deserved to die a slow, agonizing death.

Daryl was about to carve into Dwight's face, when a force bowled into him, knocking him over.

He growled and faced his attacker.

It was Jesus. 

"What are you doing!" Daryl hissed.

"Don't kill him." Jesus started. "You're better than that. You know you are. Tie him up instead." 

He didn't wait for Daryl's response, he simply threw him a rope.

Daryl never wanted to hurt someone as badly as he did then,  not even his lowlife father. He had never wanted to hurt his father like he wanted to hurt the man in front of him. 

Jesus gave him an intense look. 

"Daryl. _You're better than that."_

Daryl gave in.

His shoulders dropped forward dejectedly, and tied Dwight up.

Maybe Jesus was right. He'd be a hypocrite if he killed Dwight now. 

"I will kill you eventually." He spat, mostly just to scare the other man. 

There was a scream. It ran on and on, overpowering the other noises in the battle. Jesus's face went pale.

"Maggie." He whispered.

Daryl froze.

No.

Maggie was okay. She had to be. He had just seen her a minute ago. That was not Maggie screaming.

Jesus took off running towards the screams, and Daryl followed.

The wailing continued. It rang on and on.

Maggie lay on her own in the grass. A knife was sticking out of her stomach. Blood turned the grass around her crimson, and she sobbed. Her breaths came out short and ragged. 

"Glenn." She gasped.

"No!" Jesus yelled. "Not yet. You aren't ready yet! Damnit, Maggie!"

She coughed, and blood spattered across her neck and chest.

"Daryl..." she wheezed. "You... you and Sasha. If something happens to Sasha..."

She broke off, coughing and gasping.

"Take care of Beth..." She whispered.

Jesus was next to her, gripping her hand so tightly his hand was going numb. 

"You're fine, you'll be fine." He sobbed.

Maggie smiled.

"I know." She whispered. "I'm going to be with Glenn." 

Maggie's body went still.

Her eyes stared expressionlessly up at the sky. 

Jesus shook her desperately. 

"Maggie! Maggie, no! Please, you're my best friend..." he sobbed.

He stood up abruptly, suddenly looking murderous. 

Then he was running. He tackled a man, and killed him with such efficiency that Daryl's jaw dropped.

Daryl didn't have much time to ponder what to do about the situation, because an explosion went off.

It was an explosion with such force, he was knocked to the ground.

Son of a bitch.

Walkers poured through a hole in the wall where the explosion went off.

He could hear screams.

Daryl couldn't tell if he was screaming himself. His ears were ringing. His eyes watered. He was coughing, smoke filling his lungs. 

A savior tried to run past him, but he fired an arrow, stopping her in her tracks. She fell to the ground dead, and he stared at her expressionlessly. 

Maggie.

Maggie.

She was gone. It finally sank in.

Daryl stared at a walker coming after him, and didn't move. He couldn't.

Suddenly Jesus was beside him again, killing the walker. His eyes were filled with hatred, venom.

"Fuck, Daryl!" He yelled. "I'm not going to lose you too! Get up! Move!" 

Daryl couldn't move. He could see so many bodies, laying motionless on the ground.

Walkers? Saviors? Friends?

He couldn't tell.

Jesus drug him away from the explosion. He heard Rick yell,

"NEGAN'S DEAD! IT'S OVER"

There were no cheers.

Imstead there was silence.

Walkers continued to pour in through the hole, drawn by the noise. 

Daryl felt numb.

He felt no relief.

It wouldn't be over, even with Negan dead.

It would never be over. 

 **** 

Rick stood in the center of the church, addressing all the people around him. 

"I have an announcement." 

Everyone waited silently. The walkers had stopped streaming through the hole after awhile, and everyone had gathered in the church.

Dwight stood next to Rick, looking like he'd rather be anywhere else.

"Dwight is going to be the new leader of... of the saviors." Rick began, somewhat hesitantly. 

There were cries of outrage. Daryl could see red. His heart was pounding, his hands shaking. No.

Rick held up a hand until the protests died.

"He helped us! This was his plan, to kill Negan, and he will continue to help us! This is what's going to happen, for now. This is not a democracy, we're not voting on this." 

There was more silence.

"How do we know Negan is actually dead?" A girl asked timidly. 

Rick gave a small smile, but there was no humor in it.

"I killed him with his own goddamn baseball bat. How bloody ironic is that. His body is out there among the rest, go look for yourself."

More silence. Daryl looked around the room. He froze, suddenly realizing something. 

"Where's Carol?" He asked.

Rick turned to face him slowly.

Pain was etched into the lines of his face.

"WHERE THE HELL IS CAROL!" Daryl asked again, voice raised. 

Rick took a deep, shuddering breath.

"Daryl..." he started.

Daryl glared.

"Tell me where the fuck Carol is. _NOW_."

"We aren't sure, Daryl... we think, well... she was close to the bomb when it exploded, and-"

Daryl stormed out of the church.

He ran.

He ran past the front gates, through the woods, as far as he could run.  

He leaned against a tree and screamed as he slowly slid down the tree.

With shaking hands, he lit a cigarette and burned his skin.

It did not take the pain away.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kate suggests that you listen to "Bleeding out" by Imagine Dragons during this chapter!

Jesus had watched Daryl run out of the church. He leaned against a wall, took a deep breath, and closed his eyes.

He had already lost Maggie. He didn't want to lose anyone else.

Maggie had wanted Daryl there for Beth. Maybe he should go after to Daryl, just to make sure he was okay. He started to follow, but Rick grabbed his arm and shook his head.

"Give him some time." He said quietly.

Rick swayed slightly on his feet, looking exhausted. They had lost a lot, but they had also gained everything. They needed to focus on the positives.

You had to, in this world. Linger too long on the bad things, and you'll go insane.

Jesus looked out the church windows at the sunset. There was still beauty in the world.

"Everyone go rest." Rick said, with a sigh.

"We'll clean up this mess tomorrow."

 **** 

Daryl sat there, staring blankly at the ground.

What kind of life was this?

He buried his head in his hands.

He had smoked cigarette after cigarette, and his hands throbbed from the burns. How long had he been sitting here, staring at nothing? Minutes? Hours? He didn't care.

Did anything really matter anymore?

Daryl didn't even raise his head when he heard the rustling of tree branches. If it was a walker, so be it.

A hand grasped his shoulder, and he waited, unmoving.

For fucks sake. 

He silently begged the walker to kill him already. 

Then someone cleared their throat. He glanced up, and of course, it was Jesus.

"Leave." He spat.

Jesus simply sat next to him, a pained look on his face. He held out a can of food.

"I brought you something, in case you're hungry..." he said quietly.

Daryl glared.

"I ain't hungry."

Daryl put his head in his hands again.

Jesus nudged him gently.

Daryl's head snapped up, and he raised a fist, fully intent on punching the bastard next to him.

Jesus flinched.

He held Daryl's vest out hesitantly, fully expepecting to be punched in the face. 

Daryl slowly lowered his fist, and took the vest. It didn't feel like his own anymore. He could only picture it on Dwight.

He scowled.

They sat in silence.

"I'm sorry, about...Carol." Jesus murmured. 

Daryl stared expressionlessly at the ground. He felt nothing. 

"Daryl, please, say something." Jesus begged.

"Leave." Daryl responded.

He wasn't in the mood for this. He couldn't... he couldn't talk about it. Not now. 

Jesus narrowed his eyes.

"No." He challenged. 

 He softened slightly when he saw the the desperate look on Daryl's face. 

"I understand what you're going through." 

"You don't." Daryl rasped. 

"I do. I know. It's an awful feeling." 

They sat in silence for what felt like forever.

"We've all lost people, Daryl. We both lost Maggie. You need to know that life is going to go on. Everything is going to continue. It's going to be better now. I don't want to lose you. Not to death, not to yourself, not now. Come home with me. It will be okay."

"It ain't going to be okay." Daryl snarled. "Because she's gone... damnit, she's gone..."

Daryl closed his eyes. A single tear rolled down his cheek.

Jesus felt furious. He wanted to kill someone.

Punch something.

Get revenge.

They fucking broke Daryl. They took Carol, and Maggie, and everyone's sanity. They _tortured_  Daryl. 

He put a hand on Daryl's shoulder, trying to soothe the other man. 

"It's okay, Daryl. It's okay..." 

******

Jesus had convinced Daryl to walk home with him. He was sitting on the couch, staring at nothing. Jesus sat next to him, not sure what to do.

He leaned against the couch, and started to sing quietly. His mother had always used to sing to him when he was upset, and it had always helped him relax.

Maybe it would help Daryl, too? 

 He closed his eyes and sang,

 _"Darling hold me in your arms the way you did last night, and we'll lie inside, for a little while. I could look into your eyes until the sun comes up, and we're wrapped in light and life and love. Put your open lips on mine and slowly let them shut, for they're designed to be together. With your body next to mine our hearts will beat as one. We're wrapped in light, we're afire love_."

That was the first song that had come to mind, for some reason. It was low, it was soothing.

It was what Daryl needed. 

When he opened his eyes, Daryl was staring at him. As they made eye contact, Daryl quickly looked away.

Jesus smiled a little, and continued singing. 

Daryl's eyes began to droop, and he was soon asleep. 

**** 

Daryl woke on the couch, his neck hurting like hell. He didn't even remember falling asleep, just Jesus's blue eyes, and his soothing voice. All he could think about was how much he had enjoyed that voice.

It scared him.

Everyone got up early. They were patching the wall, taking care of the bodies, digging graves.

Daryl helped the for awhile, but could not bear all the people. He couldn't bear the looks of sympathy people cast upon him. He couldn't stand the sobbing.

Daryl left abruptly to go hunting.

No one stopped him. 

He crept through the woods, eyes focused up towards the sky, looking at a bird.

He pulled his crossbow out, continuing to walk forward. 

He was so captivated by the bird, he nearly tripped over something. 

He glared, and glanced down. 

What he saw made him gasp. 

"Carol?" He whispered.

Her face was bloody, covered in dirt. She wasnt moving.

Daryl threw his bow roughly to the side, and bent down next to her.

He put a hand against her neck, desperate to feel a pulse.

He breathed out a sigh as he felt a faint pounding underneath his fingertips. She was alive.

Daryl didn't know what to feel. He couldn't allow himself to feel relief, not yet.

He picked Carol up, bridal style, and ran to Alexandria, as quickly as he could. 

*****

Daryl sat on the porch of an old house, where a doctor from The Kingdom was staying. He had delivered Carol to a doctor as soon as he could.

He felt terrible. 

She had been out there all night. He should have looked for her. 

Michonne exited the house, and sat next to him on the stairs. Daryl glanced up, wondering why she had been inside the house. 

"Carl broke his arm." She explained.

Daryl fought the urge to snort.

That kid really was accident prone.

"He okay?" He asked. 

Michonne nodded. She leaned her head against Daryl's shoulder. Daryl tensed, surprised at the action, but he didnt move away. 

"Somehow, I just know everything is gonna be okay. Carol's gonna be okay. We're gonna have a life, Daryl. A life outside of Neagan. A life where we can be happy." She said. 

Daryl didn't respond. He didn't know what to say. Every time he tried to say something, he choked up. So he said nothing.

They sat there in silence, until the doctor opened the door.

Both Michonne and Daryl turned around to look at him. 

The doctor glanced at Daryl, looking exhausted and weary. 

"I have good news and bad news. I'm afraid Carol is in a comma, Mr... Dixon, isn't it? But the good news is, I think she has a chance of waking up fairly soon."

Daryl let out a shuddering breath.

Michonne grasped his hand.

"Would you like to see her for awhile?" The doctor asked.

Daryl nodded, and followed him into a small room.

Carol lay on a cot, looking slightly better, but still lifeless.

Daryl knelt next to the bed and took her hand.

"Please, Carol." He rasped. "Wake up."


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kate recommends you listen to "If I Lose Myself" By One Republic during this chapter.

Daryl sat next to Carol all day, holding her hand and talking to her softly. 

He talked more that day then he could ever remember talking before. 

"Once, you asked me what food I missed most from before." He whispered. "I didn't want to tell you, so I lied. It's actually ice cream."

He willed her to open her eyes.

Rick walked into the room slowly, eyeing Daryl wearily.  

"Daryl, you've been here all day. Go home and get some rest. God knows you need it. I'll sit with her for a bit."

Daryl didn't want to leave. If Carol woke up, no, _when_ Carol woke up, he wanted to be the one next to her. But then again, the doctor had said it could be days before she actually woke up, and he couldn't sit there for days.

He slowly got up, not wanting to leave.

Rick watched him go, a thoughtful look on his face.

"I think he's okay." Rick thought.

*****

Daryl opened his front door, and walked in the living room.

He immediately stopped, then walked out, a look of disgust on his face. 

Jesus was on the couch, tangled up in some guy Daryl had never seen before, making out. Hard.

He felt... angry?

No, he wasn't sure that was the right word.

He didn't know what he felt.

He heard a crash, and Jesus stumbled out of the living room towards Daryl. 

"D-Daryl!" He slurred.

Daryl shook his head. Of course he was drunk, the idiot.

He started to leave.

"Wait!" Jesus yelled, a little to loudly.

Daryl did not wait.

He left the house, and walked to Aaron and Eric's, where he knocked harshly on the door.

Eric opened it.

"Daryl!" He said with a smile. "Come in!"

******

Daryl, Aaron and Eric sat at the table eating some old potato soup from a can.

"Can I stay here, tonight?" Daryl asked, so quietly that they could barely hear him.

Aaron and Eric exchanged a look.

"Absolutely." Aaron said. "And you know, if you want to talk..." he started.

Daryl shook his head.

"No." He growled. "Thanks, but no." 

They ate the rest of their dinner in silence.

 ******

Daryl woke up early, before Aaron and Eric did, and left before they could ask him anymore questions.

When he returned home, Jesus appeared to be gone. 

He relaxed a little.

He sat on the couch, sharpened his knife, and thought for a while.

He had been alone all of ten minutes, when the door opened and Jesus walked in.

Jesus had dark circles under his eyes, and he looked utterly miserable.

Daryl eyed him, then went back to sharpening his knife, pretending nothing had happened.  

Jesus waited a few seconds, then began rambling.

"Last night, I- I made a mistake, it was a mistake, and I was upset, and you-you don't, and... I shouldn't have done it." He finished.

Daryl stared at him, trying to process the words that had just fallen out of his mouth. 

"Don't care." He said.

Why would he care who Jesus was with? It didn't matter to him.

But he did care, and it did matter to him, and that bothered him immensely. 

He abruptly stood up.

"Im goin out." He muttered. 

 Jesus looked dejected.

"Oh.. okay. I'll... see you later?"

Daryl gave a curt nod, and then he was gone. 

******

Daryl found himself walking to a house he had never been to before.

He thought back to a few months ago when a lady, he thought her name was Katherine, had stopped him.

"You know.." she had said, winking suggestively. "I find you very attractive. And, well, if you ever need anything, I'm in that small yellow house right there." 

She had walked away at that, leaving Daryl stunned, and Rick cracking up.

Now Daryl stood in front of that small yellow house, debating if he should knock or not.

Katherine opened the door before he could make a decision. 

"Are you going to come in, or just stand there?" She asked, smirking. 

Daryl took a deep breath, and walked through the front door.

"What can I do for you? Are you here to take me up on my offer?"

She eyed him up and down, a hopeful look in her eyes.  

Daryl said nothing. His hands shook slightly.

He needed to do this.

He needed to _feel_ something.

Seeing that Daryl wasn't about to make the first move, Katherine walked over, wrapped her arms around his neck, and kissed him deeply.

 _Feel something_.

He pushed her against the wall, his hands skimming under her shirt.

 _Feel something_.

Hands were tangled in hair, lips intertwined. Heavy breathing.

 _Feel something_.

A shirt was off, pants unzipped, hands everywhere.

 _Feel something_.

He felt nothing.

Daryl stopped.

"I should go." He panted.

She looked disappointed, and confused, but said,  

"Alright... But if you ever want to do this again... I'm here."

Daryl nodded, pretending he would come back.

He knew he wouldn't. 

*****

Daryl stayed out the rest of the day, visiting Carol, hunting, and helping take care of the bodies still inside the gates. He talked to Rick, and kept himself busy, and did not think of Jesus.

Jesus sat on the couch, thinking about Daryl. Thinking of all the times he had slept next to Daryl. Thinking of their conversations, no matter how short they were. Thinking of how Daryl had saved him. Thinking about how much he liked him. How much he WANTED him.

But he had messed up, and Daryl saw him with another guy.

He felt so lonely, so desperate that night.

He had felt so much _want_.

Daryl didnt feel that. Not for him, at least. 

Jesus had to feel again. He had to. 

He had to feel something other than pain, something other than sadness.

If Daryl couldn't help him forget about everything, then someone else could.

But they didn't, because all Jesus could think about was Daryl, and how much he wished he was kissing _him_ , and how he wanted his hands tangled in _his_ hair, and how he wished he was on the couch with _him_. Not just some random guy he had just met.

Jesus jumped when Daryl flung the front door opened.

He appeared annoyed, and he didn't look at Jesus.

"Daryl..." Jesus started. "I want to tell you something."

He swallowed. He was going to do it. Screw it if Daryl didn't feel the same.

"Not now." Daryl grunted.

He looked distracted, and quickly walked up the stairs to his bedroom.

Jesus sighed.

He would tell him eventually.

******

Daryl lay in his bed, staring at the ceiling, unable to sleep. He wondered if anyone could sleep after Neagan, because, like Jesus had said, everyone had lost someone.

Speaking of Jesus, he wondered what he had wanted to tell him.

Daryl sighed.

He had thought about Jesus most of the day.

Though he had kept busy, and told himself he wasn't thinking about it, he was. It had finally occurred to him that he felt... jealous.

Then he felt anger, and then annoyance, because he was not supposed to feel that way about someone he hated.

He closed his eyes. Fuck. Don't feel, he thought. Don't think, just sleep.

He was drifting into sleep when he heard sounds coming from the room next to him. He groaned.

"If he's having sex over there, im going to kill him." He muttered. 

Then he realized the sounds were more like whimpers.

Daryl rolled out of bed. He should go to check on Jesus quickly, just to make sure that everything was alright.

He padded down the hallway and slowly opened Jesus's door. It was obvious that the younger man was still sleeping.

He thrashed and whimpered, murmuring quietly. 

"Daryl..." Jesus whispered in his sleep. 

Daryl froze. Jesus was yelling now. 

"No! Please...."

Daryl finally moved. He shook Jesus.

"Rovia!" He said loudly.

Jesus bolted awake, and stared at Daryl with wide eyes. He looked like he might cry, and he was breathing heavily. Daryl stood there silently for a minute, simply regarding the man in front of him. 

"It was just a dream." Daryl muttered, and started to walk out.

"Wait! Stay."  Jesus blurted. 

Daryl was about to object, but then he remembered how Jesus had stayed with him. He sighed, and sat next to Jesus.

"Lay down?" Jesus asked.

Daryl didn't move for a bit, but eventually hesitantly laid down next to Jesus. Jesus took a deep breath, and put his head on Daryl's shoulder. Daryl tensed, but did not move.

"He's just scared." Daryl thought. "This doesn't mean anything."

Jesus relaxed against Daryl.

"He's not moving..." Jesus thought. "Maybe this means something." 

Then he was asleep, and he thought he could feel Daryl brushing the hair away from his face as the peacefulness of sleep overtook him.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kate suggests listening to "Look after you" by The Fray for this chapter

Daryl and Jesus sat at the kitchen table the next morning in silence.

Jesus wondered if now would be a good time to tell Daryl how he felt, but Daryl appeared to be deep in thought, and he felt bad interrupting that.

He ate a bowl of cereal and thought about what he would tell Daryl.

He didn't want to go about it elementary school style, saying "I like like you."

That was stupid.

It also suggested that what he felt was just a small crush.

It wasn't. 

What did he feel towards Daryl? Protective? Curious? 

There was so much about Daryl that he wanted to know. He wanted to know everything about him, no detail too small. For instance, he wondered what his favorite color was, and what music did he like?

He wanted everything.

While Jesus thought about this, Daryl thought about his father. Would he be proud of him? Proud of Merle, in the end? No, he would probably make fun of Merle, call him a softie. His father was a self preserving bastard. So why did he care about what his father would think about him?

He shook his head, annoyed, and glanced up to see Jesus, staring into his cereal bowl, looking worried.

Daryl wondered briefly what the problem was, before shrugging it off.

He thought about Carol, and how he wanted to talk to her so badly.

Life felt... empty without her.

He should visit her later today, and ask the doctor about her progress.

"Daryl, I need to tell you something." Jesus said, quietly.

He looked nervous.

Daryl was about to respond when there was a knock at the door.

He looked at Jesus, who shrugged.

"Tell me later." He muttered, and got up to answer the door.

Sasha stood on the front porch, Beth in her arms.

Daryl raised an eyebrow.

"I need you to watch Beth today." Sasha explained. "I'm going on a run with Rosita, and you're her guardian."

Daryl frowned.

"I can't watch no baby." He protested.

Sasha shrugged.

"Here's her formula. Feed her at noon, three, and seven tonight. I should be back tomorrow morning." 

She pressed Beth into his arms.

Beth grinned up at him, chewing on a hand, cooing happily.

Daryl sighed.

"Fine." He muttered.

Sasha smiled.

"Good luck, Uncle Daryl."

 *******

Beth howled as Daryl struggled to change her diaper.

"Damnit!" He swore. "Sit still- ugh! This is impossible."

Jesus watched him, laughing. He shoved Daryl gently away from Beth.

"Let me do it." He said.

He changed her with such ease, Daryl couldn't help but feel annoyed, and a little stupid.

Daryl took Beth from his arms, and rocked her gently until soft snores were heard.

He laid her gently on the couch, and sat on the floor next to her so she wouldn't fall. He looked exhausted, and Jesus had to chuckle.

Daryl's hair was sticking up, and he looked frazzled, but he gazed at Beth with such adoration that Jesus thought his heart might melt.

"That's adorable." He said quietly.

"What is?" Daryl demanded.

"The way you look at her."

Jesus nodded towards Beth.

Daryl scowled, and looked away.

He ran a thumb across Beth's cheek, and Jesus did not miss the small smile on his face.

Daryl watched Beth sleep for a moment.

Oh, how she looked like her father.

"I'll always protect you, little girl." He whispered. 

It hurt him, knowing that he was the reason her father was dead. He would protect Beth with his life. She deserved all the happiness in the world.

He thought about Hershel, and what a great grandfather he would have been.

Yes, he would protect her, with everything he had.

*****

It was night time, and after a chaotic dinner, Beth was asleep on the couch again.

Daryl was sitting on the floor next to the couch, fast asleep.

Jesus had to laugh. It wasn't even 8:30 yet. He sat next to Daryl on the floor, and smiled at the snores coming from both Daryl and Beth.

He ran a hand through Daryl's hair, and for the first time in awhile, thought he might be happy.

Things could be like this forever, if Daryl was his partner.

God, how he wanted Daryl to be his partner. To be able to run his fingers through his hair, whenever he felt like it....

To be able to kiss him...

The thought nearly drove him insane.

Daryl shifted next to Jesus in his sleep, and Jesus froze, slowly untangling his fingers from Daryl's hair.

Daryl continued snoring, and Jesus relaxed. 

He watched Daryl sleep for awhile, then he closed his eyes, leaned against the couch, and fell asleep.

********

Sasha came the next morning, as promised.

Daryl had said "finally." and pretended that he was annoyed that he had to watch Beth, though everyone knew he felt otherwise. 

Though he acted annoyed, he had fallen in love with the little girl, and loved her just as much, if not more, than her mother and aunt.

Jesus kissed Beth on the head, and called, 

"Take care, sweetheart!"

Daryl felt a small smile play on his lips.

 

******

 

Daryl sat next to Carol, holding her hand.

He told her about Beth, how much he loved her, and how she probably had him wrapped around her little finger.

Daryl jumped when she squeezed his hand.

"Carol?" He asked. "Can you hear me?"

She squeezed his hand again.

Relief swept over him, and he started to cry.

"Carol..." He rasped.

He tried to pull himself together, and then went to tell the doctor. The doctor smiled and nodded as Daryl told him the news. 

"She can hear you. That's a good sign, I think she'll be awake soon."

Daryl nodded, relieved. He said goodbye to Carol, and promised her he'd be back tomorrow. He went home, feeling happier than he had in a long time.

When he got home, he saw Jesus had made mac and cheese. He sat down and ate, and talked more than Jesus had ever heard him talk before.

He talked about Carol, and what great news it was, and how he wondered if he would have to watch Beth often.

Jesus smiled.

"What did you want to tell me yesterday?" Daryl asked.

Jesus froze.

"Um. Nothing. Nothing important." He lied. 

Daryl was in such a good mood, he didn't want to ruin it. He would tell him later.

They talked for awhile, and Rick and Michonne even stopped by for an hour or so.

Everything felt normal.

Jesus found himself wishing that the night wouldn't end, so he could see Daryl look happy for just a little while longer.

He wanted to hear him laugh at some stupid joke Rick made, or watch his eyes light up when Michonne talked about Beth, for just a little while longer. 

Why couldn't every day be like this? 


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is "Unsteady" by X ambassadors.

Aaron and Eric sat on their front porch, holding hands.

Their house was across the street from Daryl's, and Aaron could see Jesus and Daryl sitting at their kitchen table together through the window.

He watched them closely, and Eric nudged him.

"Stop being noisy!" Eric reprimanded, laughing.

Aaron gave him a look.

"Have you _seen_ the way Jesus has been staring at him? I am 100% sure that there is something going on there."

"Oh please. Maybe Jesus is interested, but I can hardly see Daryl being into him." Eric replied.

"I'll bet you $50 that they'll get together." 

Eric simply shook his head.

"Money's worthless now, but you're on."

********

Jesus glanced out the kitchen window to see Aaron and Eric, sitting close together, holding hands, and smiling.

He sighed, feeling a kind of longing. If only.

He looked at Daryl, who was mindlessly spinning a cigarette around his fingers.

"What do we do now that we aren't worried about Negan all the time?" Jesus asked.

Daryl bit his lip.

"Dunno." 

They sat there in silence for awhile.

"Does life ever feel...empty to you?" Jesus finally asked him.

Daryl rolled his eyes.

"What's with all the questions?"

Yes, Daryl never was much of a talker.

"I'm just curious..." Jesus murmured. 

There was another beat of silence.

"Yeah. It does." Daryl replied quietly. 

"What?" 

"Life feels empty sometimes." 

"Oh." 

Jesus glanced up and met his eyes. Daryl held eye contact for a minute, then glanced way.

"Daryl, I-" Jesus started, but a yell outside interrupted.

"WALKERS!" Someone yelled.

Daryl bolted up, grabbed his crossbow, then ran out the door. 

Jesus sighed, frustrated. 

He followed Daryl slowly.

There were about a dozen walkers that had gotten in through the front gates, and people were running around screaming. 

Rick ran next to Daryl.

"Who left the front gate open?" He yelled.

No one answered. A walker bit into a ladies neck, and she screamed.

Rick didn't recognize the lady, but he felt Daryl tense next to him. 

"Katherine..." Daryl muttered, looking horrified. 

As the lady screamed, Daryl ran and killed the walkers alongside Rick.

He knelt next to Katherine, and cringed as she began choking up blood.

"Daryl..." she choked.

Daryl looked uncomfortable.

"Thank you... for making..." she stopped to cough, then continued. "My last few days...enjoyable."

Her eyes closed, and Daryl shifted on his feet awkwardly. 

"Uhhh...." he said.

Rick gave him a look.

"Last few days enjoyable, huh?" He asked.

Daryl was blushing slightly, and Jesus felt annoyed. Daryl had said he wasn't into women. Had that been a lie?

Jesus stood next to Daryl, and they watched people continue to run around frantically. 

Daryl glanced at the chaos around him. 

"We're not living. This isn't living. We're just alive." He muttered.

"I'm living." Jesus whispered, so quietly that Daryl could barely hear him. "I'm living now that I'm with you."

Jesus regretted it the second he said it. Daryl tensed, and turned away. Something flashed in his eyes. Jesus sighed.

Maybe he had been wrong to want to tell Daryl how he felt.

 *******

The words repeated themselves in Daryl's mind. 

"I'm living now that I'm with you."

What the hell did that even mean? God, his thoughts lately.

His thoughts about Jesus... his brother would've killed him if he knew what he'd been thinking the past few days.

What was he thinking?

That maybe he wanted to live with Jesus for awhile longer?

That maybe he actually enjoyed his company sometimes?

He couldn't let himself think like that.

Jesus was someone he had been forced to live with, forced to talk to, and forced to go on runs with.

Nothing more.

*****

Daryl was about to leave the front gates of Alexandria when they swung open, and Gregory stepped through the gates.

Gregory swung a gun wildly around, eyes wild. 

He spotted Daryl, and his eyes went wide.

"You!" He yelled. "You're the one they're looking for!"

Daryl raised an eyebrow, and Gregory pointed the gun at him. 

"NOBODY MOVE!" Gregory shouted.

There was no one even out.

What an idiot, Daryl thought.

People had started to come out of their houses at the yelling though, and gasped when the saw Gregory, and his gun against Daryl's temple.

Daryl doubted he even knew how to shoot a gun, but he supposed it wouldn't be smart to test that theory right now.

"You're the one the saviors want!" Gregory shouted.

What? Did Gregory not realize Negan was dead now?

Daryl saw a flash of movement from the corner of his eye.

He slowly turned his head, and saw Jesus slowly creeping up behind Gregory.

Jesus put a finger to his lips, as if Daryl was going to say something.

Jesus held a shovel, and Daryl fought the urge to start laughing.

Oh man, this Gregory bastard had no clue what was coming to him.

Jesus raised his arms, and brought the shovel down over Gregory's head.

A gun shot went off, and Daryl felt an explosive pain in his side.

He groaned, and heard Jesus gasp.

"Daryl!"

Daryl fell next to Gregory, who was now unconscious.

His vision was blurry. He could see Jesus and Rick standing over him.

Jesus looked frantic.

"Daryl! Daryl!" He called.

Daryl closed his eyes. His breathing slowed.

"Fuck!" Jesus yelled. 

And then there was nothing.

******

Daryl woke up on a bed.

His arms and legs were chained to his sides.

He panicked, and began to thrash around.

"Daryl!" a voice yelled. "Daryl, stop!"

Daryl opened his eyes.

Jesus stood above him, looking worried.

Jesus let out a sigh. 

"I'm going to untie you now. We had to tie you up in case you... you know...turned."

Daryl glared up at him.

"Where's Gregory?" He asked. 

Jesus shifted.

"Um. He's dead."

"How?" 

"I killed him." Jesus said quietly.

Daryl stared at him, disbelief clear on his face. 

"You what? Why?" He asked.

"Well- it's just- he hurt you..." Jesus mumbled.

Daryl couldn't imagine how furious Rick would be.

He sighed.

"How long have I been out?" He asked.

Jesus looked nervous.

"A few days..."

"A few days?!" 

Jesus nodded.

"Look, I'm going to get you some pain meds." He said.

Daryl shook his head no.

"Ain't need no pain meds. Why'd you kill Gregory, Paul?"

Jesus sat down on the edge of his bed.

"Because you've saved me twice now, and when I tried to help you, and you ended up getting shot. I felt terrible, angry at Gregory for hurting you, and angry that Negan did what he did.. and it's just that... rage overtook me."

Daryl sat there, staring at him. Jesus stared back, his gaze unwavering. 

He felt no remorse for what he had done. 

"We thought that we were going to lose you.." Jesus said quietly. "The bullet just barely missed your vital organs..."

Daryl looked away.

Jesus got up, left the room, and came back a few minutes later.

He held out a pill and some water.

Daryl took it and drank the water. He didn't want to take the pill, but Jesus glared and said, 

"Take it." 

His voice made it clear there was no room for argument, so Daryl took it. 

They sat there for awhile, watching each other.

"How's Carol?" Daryl asked.

"Why don't you ask her yourself?" He asked, with a small smile.

Daryl fought the urge to shoot up.

"She's awake?" He asked.

Jesus nodded.

"She's resting right now. She was in to see you earlier. So was Rick."

"Good. I'm glad she's okay." 

Daryl sighed happily, and leaned back against his pillow, feeling somewhat content.

He felt a hand on his arm.

He opened an eye.

Jesus stared at him. 

"Daryl? Are you okay? I was... worried." 

Daryl felt his heart skip a beat.

"M'Fine. I- thanks for being here." He muttered.

Jesus's face lit up.

"Ill always be here." He replied.

Daryl didn't have much time to ponder what that meant, or realize that Jesus still had a hand on his arm, because he was drifting into sleep.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Kate chose for this chapter is "The Exception" by Paramore

When Daryl woke again, he saw Jesus was still sitting next to him, his head leaned against the wall, sound asleep.

Rick was also there, sitting on an uncomfortable looking folding chair.

"How are you doing?" He asked Daryl.

Daryl shrugged.

"M'Fine."

Rick nodded towards Jesus.

"He wouldn't leave your side, you know." 

Daryl felt an odd feeling in his stomach. He ignored it.

"He just feels responsible for what happened." Daryl muttered.

Rick shook his head.

"Nah. I don't think that's the reason he's stayed with you all this time."

Daryl shifted uncomfortably.

"When can I leave?" He asked, eager to change the subject. 

He hated laying in bed all day. He wanted to get out, go hunting.

Rick sighed.

"You just got shot, Daryl, don't push it. But the doctor said you could leave in a day or two. You have to rest at home, though, and of course, Jesus volunteered to take care of you."

Daryl shook his head. He didn't need to be taken care of. Shot or not, he was fine. 

He glared at Rick, annoyed.

Carol walked through the door, and Daryl felt his frown fade.

Rick glanced at Carol, and stood up.

"I'll give you two some time." He said, walking out.

Carol smiled softly at him.

"You always manage to get yourself almost killed every time I'm not here to watch you."

Daryl simply grunted, and Carol laughed.

"Your overprotective boyfriend over there refused to leave your side." 

Daryl tensed, and his glare returned.

"You know he cares about you."

She said quietly.

Daryl glanced away.

"And it's okay if you care about him too..." she continued.

Daryl growled.

"I don't." He spat.

Carol smirked.

"You know, I could hear every word you said to me while I was in the coma. I'm not stupid, Daryl. I can read between the lines."

Daryl said nothing.

He didn't know what to say.

Next to him, Jesus shifted and opened his eyes.

He looked at Daryl and smiled.

"You're awake!" He exclaimed.

Daryl felt incredibly awkward.

"Um. Yeah..." he mumbled.

Jesus frowned at him.

"Something wrong?" He asked.

Daryl shook his head.

"Nah."

Carol glanced between the two of them, and smirked.

"I'm going to go rest. You two take care."

She left the room, leaving an awkward Daryl and a confused Jesus. 

"Why are you here?" Daryl asked.

Jesus frowned.

"You know why. I'm worried about you, and feel responsible."

Daryl felt that damn feeling in his stomach again, when Jesus said he was worried.

He pushed it away and managed to frown.

"It ain't your fault." He muttered.

The doctor walked in, and Jesus quickly stood up. The space next to Daryl now felt empty and cold.

The doctor smiled.

"Good Afternoon, Mr. Dixon. I'm glad to see you're healing well. You can go home, but you'll need to rest for at least another week. It's going to be hard for you to walk for awhile, so take it easy. I want to see you back here in a week for a checkup."

Daryl hated how fast the doctor talked, how happy he looked. He glared at the doctor, who seemed unfazed.

Jesus shot a glance at Daryl, sighed, and turned to the doctor.

"Thank you very much." Jesus said. "I'll make sure he stays out of trouble."

The doctor hummed. 

"Mhm. See that you do." 

*******

Jesus and Daryl were halfway home. It was only a few houses away, but the walk seemed to take hours.

Daryl leaned against Jesus's side for support, his teeth gritting as he tried not to cry out from the pain. 

He was annoyed that Jesus was seeing him like this, seeing him so weak.

Daryl stumbled, and nearly fell, but Jesus caught his arm.

Daryl let out a frustrated growl.

"Damnit." He muttered.

Jesus smiled slightly.

"It's okay. I've got you." He soothed. 

Daryl once again ignored the feeling in his stomach, the way his heart began to pound just a little quicker. 

*******

Daryl had been home for a few days now.

He had been sleeping on the couch, because going up the stairs had been more trouble than it was worth. His neck hurt now though, and he silently cursed Gregory.

Jesus was making breakfast and singing softly, when there was a knock at the door.

Jesus dried off his hands and went to answer it. He opened the door to see Sasha, Rosita, and Beth standing on the porch.

Rosita balanced Beth on her hip, and smiled.

Sasha held flowers in her hand.

"We came to visit uncle Daryl!" She chirped. 

Jesus smiled brightly.

He saw the way Daryl's eyes lit up for a moment, something he hadn't seen in a few weeks. Daryl struggled to sit up. 

"I brought you flowers, Daryl." Sasha said.

Daryl rolled his eyes, but before he could say anything, Jesus interjected.

"They're lovely." He announced.

Rosita handed Beth to Daryl, and Daryl smiled a little. 

Daryl held Beth, examining her carefully. He noted she had gotten bigger.

Beth cooed happily, and occasionally reached up to tug on Daryl's hair.

Yes, she had him wrapped around her finger.

Sasha and Rosita whispered to each other for a moment.

They nodded, and turned to Daryl and Jesus.

"We have an announcement." Rosita said.

Daryl raised an eyebrow.

"Well... Rosita and I have been talking, and well, we're engaged." Sasha announced.

They held out their hands. A set of beautiful rings were on their fingers.

Jesus's face lit up. 

"That's fantastic! Congratulations!"

Daryl stared at them, surprised. He didn't even know that they had been dating. Last he had heard, they had hated each other.

Perhaps there was a fine line between love and hate. 

"Congrats." He grunted.

Sasha and Rosita both grinned.

"We broke into a jewelry store. Of course, it was full. No one wanted to raid the jewelry store when it was full of walkers." Rosita said.

Sasha and Rosita glanced at each other adoringly.

Daryl wasn't sure what to think, but they would be good moms to Beth, and Beth deserved to have a family.

He chewed his lip, thinking.

Daryl glanced over and noticed Jesus was staring at him, a look of longing on his face.

When they made eye contact, Jesus quickly glanced away.

What was that about? 

 He'd been so... weird lately. 

******

Sasha and Rosita left late that night.

Jesus had forced Daryl to take several pain meds, as he was clearly in pain, and had been skipping his doses.

Daryl was now thoroughly drugged up.

He was mumbling about nothing, and Jesus thought it was kind of adorable.

"I had a dream about you." Daryl murmured.

Jesus smiled.

"Yeah?" He asked.

Daryl nodded.

"Yeah. We were outside the apocalypse. We were living together. And Beth was with us. It was just the three of us."

Jesus's heart started skipping.

"I would like that..." he whispered.

He reached out slowly, cautiously, and brushed the hair out of Daryl's eyes.

Daryl said nothing, just hummed quietly.

He shouldn't do this, and he knew it.

Daryl was clearly drugged up, but god, he couldn't take it anymore.

He leaned forward slowly, and stared at Daryl's eyes.

Jesus hung over him, so close. He could feel Daryl's breath on his cheek. He could smell him, he smelled like the woods.

It was intoxicating.

He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and pressed his lips against Daryl's.

They were warm, and kind of rough. Jesus didn't mind.

They were perfect. They were... Daryl.

There was nothing, and then he felt Daryl kiss back, and his hands slowly wrapped around Jesus's neck.

Jesus breathed a sigh of relief.

"Daryl..." he groaned.

He eventually pulled back, and collapsed onto the couch beside Daryl.

He shouldn't have done that. It was wrong. Daryl didn't know what he was doing. 

He glanced over.

Daryl was staring around the room dreamily.

He sighed.

He could only hope Daryl didn't remember tomorrow morning when he woke up.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is "Come Home" by One Republic

Daryl did remember.

He remembered everything.

His breathing was rapid and shallow.

Jesus was next to him on the couch, sound asleep.

"No." He thought. "I can't do this."

He struggled to his feet, and groaned.

Pain shot up his side, and he clenched his jaw, trying to ignore it.

Jesus stirred, but did not wake.

Daryl let out a sigh of relief.

He couldn't stay here anymore.

He couldn't look at Jesus, he couldn't...feel...well, whatever it was that he was feeling.

He grabbed his crossbow, put on his shoes, and stumbled out the front door as quietly as he could.

The sun had not yet come up, as It was still early. There was no one out.

He saw Gabriel was on watch duty, and smiled grimly.

Perfect.

Gabriel wouldn't bother him about where he was going. He was too scared to question Daryl.

Daryl limped out the front gates, planning on getting as far away from Alexandria as possible.

*******

Jesus woke up to an empty couch.

"Fuck!" He muttered.

He searched the house. Nothing.

He ran to Rick's house and knocked on the door.

Rick opened the front door, looking groggy.

"Daryl's gone." Jesus blurted, before Rick had time to say anything.

Rick seemed to snap awake.

"What?" He asked.

"I woke up this morning, and he was gone. I don't know where he is."

Jesus was frantic. God, he was an idiot. He messed things up. Daryl could be hurt somewhere.

Rick stared at him, a worried expression on his face. 

"Lets go ask Carol if she's seen him." He suggested.

******

Of course, Carol had no clue where he was, and was worried about him as well. 

Jesus swore quietly. 

"I messed everything up." He whispered.

Carol glanced at him curiously.

"What did you do?"

Jesus sighed.

"I kissed him."

There was silence, and then Carol smiled.

"I think I understand now." She said.

He stared at her.

"What?" He asked.

"He talks about you a lot, you know." She said.

His heart skipped a beat.

"Let him think about it for awhile."

"Do you think.. do you think he likes me?" He asked.

She shrugged.

"You'll have to ask him. Go on. Go find him."

*******

Jesus was walking around the woods, looking for any signs of Daryl. It was getting dark, and he realized that he was hopelessly lost, not to mention worried sick. 

Daryl could be in danger.

He sighed. At this point, he was pretty sure that he was walking in circles.

"I'll walk as long as it takes to find Daryl." He muttered, determined. 

******

Daryl saw Jesus long before Jesus saw him.

He watched Jesus stumbling hopelessly around the woods from afar, noting that he was obviously lost. 

Daryl was amused. 

He debated helping the idiot, but didn't want to face him yet.

After a few hours of walking, Daryl's amusement only started to grow.

"God, I love that idiot." He thought, then immediately froze.

What? Where did that come from?

No.

He didn't love Jesus.

He couldn't love Jesus.

He thought back to last night, when Jesus had pushed his soft lips against his.

He was horrified to feel an erection starting.

He frowned. What was he going to do?

He froze when he saw a walker getting closer to Jesus.

Jesus continued walking around obliviously.

Daryl pulled his bow out and waited.

The walker grew closer.

It was an inch away from him when Jesus finally spun around.

He tripped backwards, and the walker fell on top of him.

Daryl gasped, and let an arrow fly. He held his breath as he watched it go straight through the walkers skull.

Jesus's eyes went wide as the arrow hit the walker on top of him.

His heart was pounding wildly. 

He shoved the walker off of him, and stared in shock when he saw Daryl running towards him.

"Daryl!" He breathed in relief.

Jesus stood up, and they stared at each other.

"Did you get bit?" Daryl asked, a bit breathless.

Jesus looked surprised.

"I-uh- no."

Daryl took a deep breath, and pulled Jesus into a hug.

Jesus tensed for a moment, surprised, but hugged back.

"Don't fucking leave like that again, Daryl. I was worried sick." He murmured into Daryl's neck.

Daryl didn't say anything, just nodded and hugged Jesus tighter, ignoring the pain in his side.

 *******

They arrived home a little past midnight. They sat on the couch next to each other, saying nothing.

Daryl drank from a bottle of whisky, trying to calm his nerves.

"Daryl?" Jesus asked. "Can we talk about this?" 

Daryl nodded, and Jesus took a deep breath.

"Look." He started. "I'm just going to tell you how I feel. Daryl, I'm crazy about you. I want to know everything about you, no detail too small. I want to be here with you, everyday. I want to go on runs, and have you trust me. I want to spend every day with you, for the rest of my life. I want you to be my partner."

There was silence.

Jesus thought he might implode if Daryl didn't start taking soon.

But then Daryl was kissing him.

Jesus felt his eyes widen in surprise, and he kissed back.

The kiss was slow, warm, and gentle.

It was hesitant, almost as if both men were afraid to touch each other. 

Jesus ran his hands down Daryl's back, careful to avoid his injured side.

Daryl shifted so he leaned over Jesus, and pressed him firmly against the couch. Their kiss slowly grew with intensity as they grew more comfortable with each other. 

Daryl bit his lip and pulled, and Jesus whimpered.

"God, I want you..." Jesus whispered. "I've wanted you for so long..." 

He heard Daryl's breath hitch.

Jesus pulled back, and began sucking and biting Daryl's neck.

He smirked when Daryl moaned, and tangled his hands tightly in his hair, still not believing that this was happening.

They were kissing again, tongues exploring each other's mouths.

Jesus moaned, and Daryl pulled him closer.

Daryl was half straddling him now, and they kissed with such intensity their teeth clashed. His hands where underneath Daryl's shirt, up against his back, when Daryl suddenly gasped and pulled away.

"I can't..." he whispered.

Jesus pulled his hands away.

"I'm sorry." Daryl rasped. 

"I understand..." Jesus replied, somewhat disappointed. 

Jesus was about to move away, but Daryl caught his wrists and held him firmly in place. He pressed their foreheads together, and tried to control his ragged breathing. 

"Let me think about it." Daryl rasped. "About this whole... partner thing. It's new to me. I'm not any good at it."

Jesus smiled.

"You're perfect." He murmured, pressing his lips against Daryl's. "And I'll give you all the time you need to think about it." 

Daryl nodded breathlessly, and they sat like that for another few moments. 

"Come on." Jesus said after a while. "It's late. Let's go to bed."

Daryl nodded, dazed, and followed Jesus upstairs. He laid down hesitantly next to the younger man, and was soon fast asleep, Jesus pressed against his side.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the song for this chapter is "If I tremble" by front porch step. Kate read me this chapter out loud through FaceTime. it was beautiful and a life changing experience.

Daryl and Jesus sat on their front porch, Daryl smoking, Jesus watching him.

He still couldn't believe last night had happened. When he had said,

"Good Morning!"

Daryl had just grunted and rolled out of bed.

Jesus supposed that he shouldn't have expected anything different.

******

Aaron and Eric stared out their front window at Daryl and Jesus.

"Look at them." Aaron whispered. "Something is definitely happening there."

Eric scoffed.

"Why do you think that?"

"Well, look. Daryl looks...relaxed. Before he would just glare at Jesus. And Jesus is staring at him adoringly."Aaron explained.

Eric rolled his eyes.

"That proves noting. Daryl is getting more comfortable with Jesus, as a friend. And yeah, we've established that Jesus probably has a crush on Daryl. I mean, who wouldn't?"

Aaron glared.

"Are you saying that you have a crush on Daryl?"

Eric grinned.

"Yes."

Aaron gently punched his shoulder, trying hard not to smile.  The couple continued to argue well after Daryl and Jesus had left their front porch.

********

Daryl was deep in thought. He had never been with another man before. What if he messed everything up?

They _were_ in an apocalypse. It wasn't smart to get too attached.... but Daryl already felt attached, more so then he would like to admit.

He sighed, frustrated.

Jesus glanced over at him.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

Daryl flinched when Jesus put a hand on top of his.

"M'fine." He mumbled.

Jesus continued looking concerned.

"Can we talk about this? I...I know you have to think about the whole partner thing, but there's other things we need to talk about. Also, I use the word partner, because I feel like you would hate the word boyfriend."

Daryl felt a small smile play on his lips. Yes, Jesus was right. The word "boyfriend" seemed wrong. Too childish. This wasn't high school, after all.

He was about to respond when Rick interrupted.

"Jesus. We need you on Guard duty."

Rick glanced down, noticing Jesus's hand on Daryl's. He raised an eyebrow at Daryl and smirked.

Daryl shifted uncomfortably.

He wasn't sure if he wanted people to know that he and Jesus were...well, whatever they were.

He wasn't even fully used to the idea himself.

Jesus, however, smiled brightly and did not appear to be bothered.

"Sure. How long do you need me?" He asked Rick.

"Until later tonight." Rick replied.

Jesus looked a little disappointed, but didn't argue.

"Right." He responded.

Rick turned to face Daryl.

"Id appreciate it if you went on a run." He said.

Daryl glanced up, surprised. 

"With who?" He asked.

"Aaron." Rick replied. "I figured that he and Carol would be the only people that you would want to go with, and Carol went back to the Kingdom for a few days."

Daryl frowned.

"Why'd she leave?" He asked.

Rick smirked.

"Well, don't tell her I said this, but between you and me, I think there's something going on between her and the King."

Daryl laughed quietly. Of course Carol would get with a man who owned a Tiger.

He shook his head, amused. 

"When do we leave?" He asked.

"Now." Rick replied.

******

Daryl sat in the passenger seat of a large moving truck. For the first time ever, he had let Aaron drive when he had asked. They were currently pulling out of the gates of Alexandria. 

Daryl looked up to see Jesus sitting at the guard tower, looking worried.

"Be safe." Jesus mouthed.

Daryl nodded, and smiled a bit.

He was surprised Rick wanted him to go on a run so soon. After all, it had only been a few days since he had gotten shot. Though, he was glad to get out for awhile.

After driving in silence for awhile, Daryl noticed Aaron kept glancing over at him.

"What?" He asked.

Aaron shrugged.

"You seem... different. That's all."

"Can I ask you a question..." Daryl mumbled after another few seconds of silence. 

Aaron nodded.

"Shoot."

Daryl hesitated.

"How did you know... that you loved Eric?"

Aaron turned to him, his eyes wide.

"I knew it!" He shouted.

Daryl flinched at the sound.

"Oh man, Eric owes me $50 and has to cook dinner for a week." He announced joyfully. 

"What are you goin on about?" Daryl asked, somewhat annoyed.

"You're asking because you think you might love Jesus."Aaron said, triumphantly.

Daryl immediately became defensive.

He snorted.

"No."

Aaron laughed.

"I knew it."

Then he paused.

"I knew I loved Eric because of the way he smiled, the way he laughed. I knew because he was always concerned about me, and I knew he cared. Because every time he would look at me, I got butterflies. And when we kissed, there was nothing else like it."

Daryl sighed.

Yes, he had felt all those things for Jesus.

"He wants me to be his partner." Daryl finally said.

Aaron smiled.

"And?" He asked.

Daryl shrugged.

"I dunno yet."

*******

Jesus sat at the guard tower, feeling anxious.

It was hot, even with his hair up in a bun.

Eric sat next to him, calmly looking around the perimeter.

"You look worried." Eric commented.

Jesus sighed.

"I just hate that he's going out there without me. What if something happens?" He asked.

Eric smiled.

"I feel the same way about Aaron." He replied.

Jesus knew he hated it when Aaron left to go out on runs, or went into a battle.

He understood it now.

"How long have you guys been together?" He asked Eric.

Eric shrugged.

"15 years now, I think."

Jesus sighed, and felt another pang of longing.

"I've been trying to talk to Daryl about our relationship lately, but it's been proving difficult."

Eric looked sympathetic.

"Are you two... together?" He asked.

Jesus frowned.

"I don't know. I mean...we've kissed but-"

He was interrupted by Eric groaning.

"What?" Jesus asked.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." Eric replied. "I just lost a bet."

 *******

Daryl and Aaron arrived back at Alexandria three days later.

When Jesus saw their van pull up to the gates, he wanted to run over, kiss Daryl, and never let go.

But he didn't, because that would make Daryl uncomfortable.

Rick called everyone to the church after Daryl and Aaron arrived back.

"Listen up! I know it's been a hard few months. I want to do something for all of you. Tonight, we're going to have a party here, to celebrate our victory over Negan!" He yelled.

"I expect everyone to be here by nine. And Daryl! That includes you!"

Jesus laughed when he looked over and saw Daryl trying to sneak out of the church doors and freezing when Rick called his name.

Daryl huffed.

"Fine." He grumbled.

Jesus ran up to Daryl and caught him walking home.

"You're back!" He exclaimed.

Daryl nodded.

"Yep."

They walked in through the front door.

Daryl supposed he should go shower before this... party.

He let out a yelp of surprise when he was slammed up against the front door.

Jesus stared at him, lust clear in his eyes, and began kissing him roughly.

Daryl tensed, then slowly relaxed, and kissed back.

Jesus made a deep noise in the back of his throat, a growl, and pulled Daryl even closer. He bit and sucked Daryl's neck, and Daryl knew there would be bruises, but he didn't care.

He wanted this.

He needed this. 

Jesus grabbed his wrists, and pinned them over his head against the door. They were pressed together, hot and sticky, but neither of them seemed to mind.

Daryl gasped as Jesus slid a hand under his shirt and bit his ear.

"Paul.." he moaned.

He could feel Jesus smirk against his skin. Jesus stopped for a moment, and rested his head against Daryl's chest. 

"I was so worried about you.." he mumbled.

Daryl felt his heart flutter. He grabbed Jesus's chin, and lifted his face up so he was looking into his eyes.

He leaned forward and kissed him gently. Jesus instantly relaxed into him, kissing him back.

"I'm here now..." he murmured.

Screw the party, he thought.

Rick could be mad at him.

God, he needed this.

There was a knock at the door, and they both jumped, pulling away from each other.

Daryl attempted to smooth down his ruffled hair before opening the door.

Eric stood there, looking kind of awkward.

He glanced at Daryl, then Jesus.

"Sorry to interrupt.. but um, Rick says you need to be at the party in 30 minutes, and I'm supposed to make sure you actually go."

Jesus laughed.

"I'll make sure he goes, Eric."

Eric nodded.

"Okay, then. Um... I'll see you soon."

He walked away, and Daryl shut the door before he turned to face Jesus.

Jesus sighed.

"Go on. Go shower."

Daryl frowned, but complied.

 ******

Eric sat next to Aaron.

"You're right." Eric muttered. "I owe you."

Aaron smirked.

"I know."

"I'm pretty sure they were about to have sex when I went over there. I could hear moans coming from behind the door."

Eric shuddered, but Aaron simply laughed.

"Ah, love..."

He rested his head on Eric's shoulder. Eric smiled, and ran his hand through his partners hair. Even if he lost the bet, he was still happy.

Daryl deserved it after all.

********

Daryl felt the warm water pound against his back.

He watched the dirt and blood swirl down the drain, and let out a  sigh. 

He should talk to Jesus.

He didn't want to do anything else until they had decided to be... partners, or whatever Jesus wanted to call them. 

He didn't want to lead Jesus on.

He wanted to give a commitment.

Daryl walked down the stairs, freshly showered and dressed.

Jesus grinned.

"Mmm...you smell nice.." He mumbled, kissing Daryl lazily. "I'm torn between wanting to go show you off to everyone, or staying here in bed with you."

Jesus winked, and Daryl felt himself blush, but managed to roll his eyes.

"Shut up." He muttered. "Lets go get this party over with."

******

It was a few hours into the party.

Daryl had a few drinks, and that was the only reason he was surviving through this whole thing. 

There was music and food, and he supposed it was like every other party he had ever gone to. 

Rick and Michonne danced around with Judith, and Carl rolled his eyes at them.

Daryl and Jesus sat on a bench at the end of the room. They had talked quietly all night, neither of them really paying attention to the party.

A slow song came on, and a few couples started to dance.

"Dance with me?" Asked Jesus.

"Hell no." Daryl snorted.

"Pleasee?" Jesus begged.

Daryl sighed.

Maybe he had too much to drink, but he finally agreed.

He was vaguely aware of everyone staring at him.

Daryl felt uncomfortable, but Jesus didn't appear to mind. 

"Ignore them." Jesus mumbled.

Daryl and Jesus tripped over each other's feet, and Jesus laughed. 

"I can't dance..." Daryl muttered.

Jesus smiled. 

"Neither can I."

"I like you. A lot." Daryl blurted.

Jesus froze. Then slowly, a smile spread across his face.

"I like you too." He said. "Does this mean that we're partners now?"

Daryl felt himself blush slightly, but he nodded.

"Yeah." He said. "I suppose it does."


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is "Broken" by Jack Johnson

The rain pounded against the kitchen windows. It was late.

Jesus was sound asleep on the couch, and Daryl sat at the kitchen table. He chewed his lip as he thought, staring out the window. The rain had always relaxed him.

There was a knock at the front door, startling him from his thoughts. 

He glanced at the kitchen clock. It was past Midnight.

Who would be stopping by at this hour?

He glanced anxiously at Jesus, but he continued snoring peacefully.

Daryl let out a small sigh of relief, and got up to answer the door.

Carol stood at his doorstep, soaking wet, her wet hair plastered against her face.

"Are you gonna let me in?" She asked, as Daryl stood in the door frame, staring at her.

He quickly moved out of the way, and Carol entered.

"You're back." He stated. 

Carol simply nodded.

She glanced at Jesus, snoring on the couch, and smirked.

Daryl sighed.

"Lemmie get you something dry to wear." He muttered, not wanting to talk about Jesus at the moment. 

A few minutes later, Carol and Daryl sat at the kitchen table, both with mugs of hot chocolate in front of them.

Carol had insisted they both drink a mug.

Daryl was glad to see her again, even if she had only been gone a few days. He knew she could take care of herself, but he still worried about her.

"Why'd you go back to The Kingdom?" He asked.

Carol fiddled with her mug.

"Well, that's what I came here to talk to you about..."

She looked kind of anxious, and Daryl raised an eyebrow, urging her to continue.

"Ezekiel asked me to marry him." Carol blurted.

Daryl felt his eyes widen in surprise. After all, Carol had not known Ezekiel all that long.

"And?" He asked.

She looked down at her hands. 

"I don't know. I don't know what to do, Daryl. I think I might feel trapped in a marriage. Besides, what does marriage even mean anymore?"

Daryl thought for a minute.

"I think marriage means a hell of a lot more then it used to." He finally said.

Carol looked at him curiously.

"How do you figure?"

"Well. There's the whole 'for better or for worse' and I think we've hit the 'for worse'. I think that getting married now means that you'll stick with someone through all this shit, that you'll fight beside them. It's a hell of a commitment."

Daryl looked at his hands, feeling slightkly awkward.

Carol laughed for a minute, and Daryl felt his face heat up.

"What?" He asked, feeling kind of stupid.

"Nothing." Carol responded. "I just never thought I'd hear you say something like that."

She nodded towards Jesus.

"What's happening with him?"

Daryl put his head in his hands, groaning.

"He's my... partner. I guess. Whatever _that_ means anymore."

Carol shrugged.

"Probably the same thing you just said marriage meant."

 ********

Daryl let Carol have his bed.

He wasnt tired. He wasnt in the mood to sleep.

Instead, he watched Jesus sleep from the kitchen table, and wondered what everything meant.

He sat there until 6 o'clock in the morning, until his stomach growled, and he knew he needed to find breakfast.

He frowned, and began rummaging through the kitchen cupboards.

He pulled out a box of pancake mix, eyeing it thoughtfully.

He had never made pancakes before, but how hard could it be?

*******

Hard.

Making pancakes turned out to be hard.

A burning smell filled the kitchen, and he heard Jesus laughing quietly.

"Daryl? What exactly are you doing?"

Daryl's face began to heat up again.

"Um. Making pancakes?"

Jesus came up from behind Daryl and wrapped his arms around his waist. He kissed his neck lazily.

"Mhmm. That's what you're doing, hm?"

Jesus frowned at the mess Daryl had made of the kitchen.

He sighed, trying not to show his amusement. 

"Let me help."

******

Daryl and Jesus managed to make a few non burnt pancakes together.

Well, Jesus had managed to make a few non burnt pancakes. 

Daryl had caught a few on fire.

Jesus had laughed until tears ran down his face, and Daryl had scowled.

When Jesus had finally caught his breath, he walked over next to Daryl.

"Look, the heat is too high." He mumbled quietly. "You can tell because the butter burned the second it hit the pan. Turn the heat to low, and then you wait. You see the little bubbles coming to the surface of the pancake? That's how you know when to flip them." 

Daryl cursed under his breath.

"Okay, pancake expert." He muttered.

Jesus frowned, reached over, and threw a clump of flour into Daryl's face.

Daryl sputtered and growled.

Without hesitating, he grabbed the remaining pancake mix and dumped it over Jesus's head.

Jesus's mouth dropped open.

"You.did.not.just.do.that."

Daryl smirked, amused. 

He turned away, trying not to laugh, when something was cracked over his head.

Yellow goop flowed into his eyes, and he gasped.

Just then, Carol walked down the stairs.

"Why does it smell so-"

She stopped at the sight of them.

"Bad." She finished.

Jesus froze at the sight of Carol. Daryl realized he forgot to tell Jesus that she was here.

He also realized how bad this situation seemed.

Carol was wearing one of his t-shirts, hair messy from sleeping.  She had obviously come from upstairs from his bedroom. Jesus narrowed his eyes.

"I think I'm going to go shower." He said in a low voice.

Daryl watched him go, shaking his head. He turned to Carol.

"I..um. Made pancakes?" He finally said.

She laughed quietly.

"Go shower. I'll take care of the mess."

Daryl was about to protest, but Carol shook her head.

"Go." She said firmly. "You obviously need to shower."

Daryl took the shower in his master bedroom, since Jesus was in the other one.

He knew he would have to talk to Jesus about the situation.

He sighed in frustration, and let the hot water pound over him.

*******

Jesus frowned.

Was it really what it had looked like? Because it didn't look good. It looked like Daryl had been with Carol.

Maybe Daryl didn't really care about him...

God, he was such an idiot.

To actually believe that Daryl would care about him. He had believed him, he really had. 

But now...now he didn't know.

He got out of the shower, and pulled on his clothes quickly.

He pounded down the stairs and headed for the front door.

He heard Carol call after him, but he ignored her.

He ran out the front door, and through the streets of Alexandria.

Jesus slowed his pace after he left he gates of Alexandria, and leaned against a tree.

He just needed to think for a little while...

******** 

Daryl joined Carol on the couch after his shower. She looked slightly concerned.

"Jesus left." She announced. 

Daryl frowned. Did that idiot really think that there was something going on between him and Carol?

He closed his eyes, annoyed. 

"Let him leave." He spat.

Carol sighed.

"I've been thinking... I'm going to say yes to Ezekiel. Relationships take a lot of work... but I think it will be worth it. Daryl, if you want to be with Jesus, you need to go after him."

Daryl felt utterly annoyed. How could Jesus not trust him? 

"I shouldn't have to. He'll come back."

Carol frowned.

"And what if something happens to him out there? Is that the way you want things to end with him?"

Daryl frowned.

She was right. He had to go after the idiot.

********

Daryl found Jesus in the woods after a few hours of searching. He was leaned against a tree with his eyes closed.

"Go away." He muttered. "I don't want to talk to you."

Daryl scowled.

"Yeah well, you're going to."

Jesus's eyes snapped open. 

"No, Daryl! We're not talking right now. I want to be alone."

Daryl glared at him.

"Too bad. You're not being rational."

Jesus laughed a low, humorless laugh.

"Yeah, and you'd know all about that, wouldn't you."

Daryl felt his temper flare.

What was _wrong_ with him?

"Did last night mean nothing to you?" He snapped. "Do you really not trust me, after I saved you all those times?"

Jesus smiled bitterly.

"You saved me because you had to."

Daryl took a few calming breaths.

"Paul. Come on. You have to trust someone to be in a relationship."

Jesus's eyes flashed.

"Maybe we shouldn't be in a relationship then, Daryl. Maybe I was stupid to think that we could ever work out. We're both completely different. Maybe it's best if you just walked away right now."

Daryl took a step back, hurt.

"You're right Paul. Maybe we shouldn't. If you're going to get jealous over my friend, who is engaged for fucks sake, then yeah. Maybe we shouldn't."

Fuck. Carol was engaged? He was so stupid.

He had been so scared that Daryl didn't actually care about him, that he had said that stupid thing about them not being in a relationship.

Then Daryl had agreed, and now he was walking away.

Jesus pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes.

He had messed everything up.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> you guys are going to like this chapter lmao. Kate was pretty embarrassed writing it. The song she chose for this chapter is "In my Veins" by Andrew Belle

* * *

Fuck.

Fuck.

Fuck.

That was all Jesus could think.

Daryl was right. He had been acting completely irrational.

It was pouring now, and long past sunset. Jesus let the rain soak his clothes, not caring anymore. He sat out in the woods until he shivered. Who cared if he got a cold, or froze to death? 

Nothing seemed to matter anymore.

After awhile, he walked slowly back to the house. Jesus stood at the front door, fist raised, hesitating.

What the hell was he going to say?

He hesitated a moment longer, then knocked on the door.

There was no answer.

"Daryl!" He yelled. "I know you're in there. Talk to me! Please! I was wrong."

There was no answer.

After a minute of him pounding on the door, Carol opened it.

She looked annoyed.

"Why would you say those things to him?" She hissed.

Jesus flinched.

"Carol! I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't know. I was stupid, I was jealous. Please, is he okay?"

Carol's face softened slightly.

"He would hate me saying this, but he's obviously fairly upset."

Jesus shook his head

"I'm an idiot. I ruined it."

She sighed.

"Go try to talk to him."

Jesus pushed past her and raced up the stairs, knocking on Daryl's door.

"Daryl!" He called.

"Get out." Spat a low voice.

Jesus jiggled the door handle. It was locked.

He groaned.

"Daryl please, let me in."

"No." Daryl replied.

Jesus sighed, and slid against the door.

He sat on the floor, eyes closed. 

"Fine. But you have to come out eventually. And I'm not leaving until you do."

He could practically see the scowl on Daryl's face.

Daryl sat on the floor, leaning against the other side of the door.

He was breathing heavily.

To think that he had actually admitted that he liked Paul.

Now here they were.

There was silence on the other side of the door for awhile, and then Jesus finally spoke.

"I'm sorry Daryl. I really wasn't thinking. It's just... my old boyfriend, Alex. He cheated on me. I guess I find it hard to trust people now. But that's not an excuse. I should have trusted you. I know that you have every right to walk away. But I'm begging. _Please_. Give me another chance."

Daryl closed his eyes and rubbed his temples.

Should he?

After all, he was pretty sure a relationship like this was doomed to failure from the start. 

He had no clue what the fuck he was doing.

His father would have killed him if he knew he was in a relationship with a man.

He could walk away, pretend nothing had happened, that he hadn't felt anything.

But much to annoyance, he _had_ felt something, and he still felt something.

On the other side of the door, Jesus shifted.

"Daryl?"

Daryl kept his eyes closed for a few minutes.

Then he unlocked the door.

*******

A few hours later, they lay on the bed, staring up at the ceiling.

Jesus wrapped his arms around Daryl and refused to let go.

Daryl rolled his eyes. 

"Why won't you let go?" He asked.

Jesus buried his face in Daryl's neck.

"Because I never thought I would have the chance to do this again. I thought you would hate me forever, after what I said to you."

Daryl felt the urge to roll his eyes.

"Let's forget it happened." He muttered.

Jesus frowned, and mumbled, for the billionth time, "I'm sorry..."

"I know." Daryl responded.

He felt some of his anger slip away.

"I promise I never meant it." Jesus said, again.

Daryl did roll his eyes this time.

He pulled Jesus's face up so he could look into his eyes.

He looked... scared?

Daryl sighed, and kissed gently him. 

He hoped it would get Jesus to shut up for a few minutes. 

Jesus kissed back aggressively, surprising Daryl.

Jesus felt want and lust overpower anything he had previously been feeling.

He felt Daryl's surprise.

He didn't care.

He wanted to know that Daryl really wasn't mad at him, that they were okay.

Daryl was kissing back, so he took it as a sign that they were fine.

He rolled over on top of Daryl, hips straddling his waist. He wasted no time slipping his shirt off. He saw Daryl's eyes go a little wider, and he smirked.

He resumed kissing up Daryl's neck, and nudged him to take his own shirt off.

Daryl froze for a minute, and Jesus stopped.

Maybe he was pushing to much. If Daryl wasn't comfortable, then he would back off. He ran his hands through Daryl's hair.

"Is this okay? Because we can stop if you're uncomfortable... whatever you want, okay?"

God, he thought it would physically hurt to have to stop now, but he would do whatever Daryl wanted. He felt a smile spread across his face when Daryl shook his head, and slipped his own shirt off.

Jesus could only stare, practically drooling as he raked his eyes down Daryl's body. 

Daryl flushed under his stare.

He looked embarrassed, his eyes glancing everywhere but at Jesus's face.

Jesus slipped his hands from Daryl's hair, and gently began to trace every scar, every mark on Daryl's body, every imperfection. 

Everything that made him Daryl.

This was the man he loved.

He smiled at the thought.

"What are you smilin about." Daryl rasped.

Jesus was pleased to hear he was slightly out of breath.

"You're just so... perfect." Jesus whispered.

He heard Daryl snort, but cut him off by scraping his teeth over the sensitive part of his neck.

The snort quickly turned into a moan, and he chuckled softly. 

He could feel Daryl go hard against his thigh.

He smirked, and slowly rocked his hips as he continued sucking Daryl's neck.

"Fuck, Paul." he muttered.

Jesus rubbed his hands over Daryl's shoulders.

He kissed slowly down his abdomen, and unbuttoned Daryl's jeans.

He was wiggling the jeans off when he paused to look at Daryl.

"Is this still okay?" He asked.

"Fuck, Paul. Yes it's okay."

Jesus smiled slightly at the impatience In his voice.

He grabbed the base of Daryl's twitching cock and Daryl let his head fall back against the pillow, hips arching up.

Jesus licked slowly around his tip, and Daryl moaned. 

"Yes, like that.."

Encouraged, Jesus lowered his mouth over the entirety of Daryl. He sucked, hard.

Daryl groaned. 

Jesus bobbed up and down slowly, making eye contact with Daryl the entire time. 

"Fuck, Paul. You're beautiful." 

Daryl wondered if he had ever seen anything so beautiful before.

He didn't think so.  

God, those eyes. 

Those blue eyes were melting him...

Paul stroked Daryl's hip bones with the tips of his fingers, continuing to suck, staring into Daryl's eyes all the while.  

"Paul.. I'm going to, oh god, I can't hold it much longer.."

Jesus moaned, the thought of it was too much. He pulled his mouth away, and stroked hard with his hands.

"Come for me Daryl..." he whispered.

He felt Daryl's cock twitch, before cum hit his bare stomach.

He moaned as he watched Daryl's hips arch as he orgasmed.

Daryl had no clue the pleasure he felt, watching this, knowing he had caused this... 

Seeing it was all too much, and Jesus orgasmed alongside Daryl. 

Daryl fell back after a minute, gasping for breath.

His entire body felt like rubber, melting against Jesus. 

Jesus leaned over and kissed him gently.

Their bodies stuck together, warm and sticky with sweat.

Jesus fell onto the bed next to him, exhausted. 

He suddenly felt self conscious, though he knew he shouldn't be.

He thought it had been okay, though short.

"Was that okay..?" He mumbled.  
Daryl turned to him, eyes wide.

"Hell yes." He rasped.

Jesus smiled, and wrapped his arms around Daryl.

Daryl had never felt anything so good in his life.

Paul Rovia had just given him a fucking blow job.

And it had been...amazing.

He eyed Jesus sleepily. 

"Should I... I mean, to you?" He mumbled incoherently. 

Jesus shook his head.

"But I owe you..." Daryl protested sleepily.

Jesus rolled his eyes.

"Believe me. You do not owe me after that. It was so pleasurable for me to see you like that... God, Daryl. You're so beautiful..."

"Mm." Daryl grumbled.

"Go to sleep..." Jesus said, quietly stroking his hair.

So Daryl did, sleeping more soundly than he had in months.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is "Falling In Love In A Coffee Shop" by Landon Pigg

The next morning, Carol, Daryl and Jesus sat around the kitchen table talking.

"Rick came by late last night." Carol began "I uh, told him you were busy.."

She shifted somewhat awkwardly.

Daryl felt his face heat up, and Jesus smirked.

"Mmm... that's one way to put it. What did Rick want?" Jesus asked.

He grabbed Daryl's hand under the table, and intertwined their fingers.

Daryl still wasn't completely comfortable with everything, and tensed.

Jesus frowned at him, but didn't move his hand away.

"He wanted to see if you two would meet him for dinner tomorrow night. He said he had some things to talk about."

Carol shrugged.

"He didn't say what he wanted to talk about, though."

Daryl frowned, hoping it wouldn't be about anything bad.

"I need to go back to the Kingdom. I told Ezekiel I would give him an answer to his marriage proposal when I came back. He's probably wondering where I am."

Daryl's frown deepened. He didn't want Carol to leave.

Jesus gave his hand a squeeze, and he tried not to sigh. 

"We'll miss you." He said quietly.

Carol smiled slightly.

"I'll make sure to visit as often as I can." She promised.

*******

Daryl and Jesus were getting ready to go to Ricks house for dinner.

An hour before they had to go, Daryl threw on an ratty old  t-shirt, and  Jesus eyed him with a look of disgust.

"Oh no. You are not wearing that to dinner. Go shower. I'm going to pick out your outfit."

Daryl stared at Jesus, an annoyed look on his face.

"Like hell you are." He muttered. "I look fine."

Jesus threw up his hands in exasperation.

"At LEAST take a shower."

Daryl shook his head.

"Waste of water." He grumbled.

Jesus sighed, rubbing his temples. 

"Daryl, showering 3 times a day is a waste of water. Showering once a week is not."

Daryl rolled his eyes, but he eventually gave in.

When he was done showering, he noted that Jesus had laid out a nice shirt for him, much to his annoyance.

Knowing he would never hear the end of it, he slipped on the dark blue button up.

He didn't even know where this shirt had come from.

He made his way down the stairs, and sat on the couch next to Jesus.

Jesus let his eyes trail up and down Daryl's body.

"You look good." He murmured.

Daryl felt his face heat up, and glared.

How could Jesus do that so easily?

Jesus laughed at his reaction.

"Come on. Doesn't it feel good to be clean?" He asked. 

"No" Daryl grunted.

It did feel nice, but he sure as hell wasn't going to admit that now.

 ****

When Daryl and Jesus arrived at Rick's house, Rick looked more relaxed than Jesus had ever seen him. He had an arm wrapped loosely around Michonne's waist, and he was smiling. 

Michonne slipped away a few minutes later, heading towards the kitchen to check on dinner. 

Carl and Judith sat on the floor, playing with some of Judith's stuffed animals. Judith looked up when they entered the room.

Her eyes lit up, and she pointed at Daryl excitedly.

"Dar..Da.." she cooed.

Carl laughed.

"I think she's trying to say your name!" He exclaimed.

He turned to Judith.

"Daryl." He said, in a slow, clear voice.

She blinked.

"Dar?"

Carl shrugged.

"Close enough."

Jesus looked over at Daryl, and tried not to laugh.

He looked utterly embarrassed.

Rick leaned close to Jesus and stage whispered,

"Wow, I think you're good for Daryl. You got him to shower!"

Jesus smirked.

Daryl glared, but it had no heat behind it. 

Michonne called from the kitchen,

"Dinner's ready!"

Rick lead them into the kitchen, asking Carl to set the table. 

Once they were all seated around the table, Rick began to talk.

"Ever since the death of Gregory, we've been looking for a new leader for Hilltop. Sasha volunteered to take over, and Rosita would go with her of course. They were talking, and they didn't know if you would want Beth so far away, Daryl. They wanted to know if you'd like Beth to come live with you."

Daryl choked on the sip of water he had just taken. Jesus pounded lightly on his back, feeling kind of stunned.

Would Daryl want to take Beth?

He couldn't imagine living with a small child in the apocalypse.

Daryl shook his head rapidly. 

"I can't take care of no baby." He muttered. "But I'll visit."

Jesus let out a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding.

He felt guilty that he was relieved. It was selfish, but he didn't really want to share Daryl right now.

Rick nodded.

"That's settled then. I heard Carol is going to marry Ezekiel. That means we shouldn't have an problems trading with the Kingdom or Hilltop."

The group continued to talk for the next hour. 

They finished their dinner, after  talking about important things like going on more runs, who would take guard duty, and a few other things that concerned Daryl and Jesus.

Carl had retreated to his room, tired of listening to the boring conversation, and Judith was fast asleep.

"We should get going, then." Jesus said quietly. "We don't want to wake up Judith."

They said their goodbyes, and went home.

*******

Daryl and Jesus sat on their front porch, talking about the Kingdom and Hilltop.

It was a nice night out, around 70 degrees, with a light breeze.

They watched the fireflies buzz around them, lighting up occasionally.

"Do you think Sasha is a good leader?" Jesus asked, handing a bottle of whiskey to Daryl.

Daryl took a swig from the bottle, then shrugged.

"Yeah. I guess."

Jesus supposed that was the only thing he would get out of Daryl, as he wasn't much of a conversationalist.

"We'll visit Beth." Jesus assured him. 

He wondered if Daryl was upset he wouldn't get to see her as often.

"And for what it's worth, I think you would have been a good father."

He felt Daryl freeze next to him.

"I don't know how to be a father. I didn't have much of a role model."

He spat the last part bitterly, but Jesus knew he wasn't upset with him.

He reached out and took Daryl's hand.

"You're a good uncle, and I doubt you had a role model for that, either."

Daryl said nothing.

"Maybe we could go on a run tomorrow?" Jesus suggested.

He knew Daryl didn't like to stay inside the gates of Alexandria for very long.

Daryl shrugged.

"Maybe." He responded.

Well, that was the end of that conversation.

If it had been anyone else but Daryl, he would have been annoyed at the lack of words.

But right now, he was content just sitting next to him, holding his hand, watching the fireflies, and sharing a drink.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Kate chose for this chapter is "All We Are" by One Republic

"Lets go on a road trip." Jesus suggested suddenly.

Daryl and Jesus were currently laying in bed, Jesus running his fingers through Daryl's hair.

Daryl looked up at him.

"What?"

"I mean, why do we have to stay here, cooped up? We could stop to visit Beth, Carol, whoever. We could just drive wherever, look for some supplies along the way. I don't think Rick needs us here that badly."

Jesus smiled, thinking of a few weeks alone with Daryl.

Daryl chewed his lip, something that Jesus noticed he did whenever he was thinking.

He thought it was pretty adorable, though he would never tell Daryl that.

"Come on..." he coaxed. "It will be fun."

Daryl wanted to say yes. He didn't like being in the walls for too long. Besides, seeing Carol or Beth would be nice. But what if something happened beyond the walls, and they were days away from Alexandria or Hilltop?

What would he do if something happened to Jesus? But Jesus was staring at him with large, pleading eyes, and he didn't think he could say no.

"Fine." He finally agreed. 

*****

When Jesus proposed the idea to Rick, he had simply raised his eyebrows.

"What is the purpose of this... little excursion again?"

Jesus sighed, hoping he could convince Rick to let them go.

"I was thinking that we could venture out farther than we've ever really been before? Take an RV, look for supplies on the way."

Rick rubbed his temple, shooting Jesus a weary look. 

"It's kind of risky...but I suppose I can't stop you from going."

A bright smile lit up Jesus's face, and Rick simply looked tired. 

"We'll be okay."Jesus promised.

"If you die out there, I'll kill you." Rick threatened. 

Jesus laughed quietly. 

"I know."

****

Daryl and Jesus sat in the RV the next day.

Daryl, of course, was driving.

Jesus had teased him about being a control freak, and now he was in somewhat of a bad mood.

Jesus had been chattering non stop, and Daryl was already beginning to somewhat regret his decision.

"I miss listening to the radio. I miss hearing new songs come out." Jesus ranted. "One of my favorite bands was Secondhand Serenade. Have you heard of them?"

Daryl shook his head.

"Nah."

"Oh, well I'm going to sing one of their songs. I'll be your radio!"

Daryl rolled his eyes.

Jesus leaned his head back against the seat and closed his eyes.

_"The buttons on my phone are worn thin. I don't think that I knew the chaos I was getting in. But I've broken all my promises to you. I've broken all my promises to you.  
Why do you do this to me? Why do you do this so easily? You make it hard to smile because you make it hard to breathe, why do you do this to me?"_

Daryl fought the urge to close his eyes. He relaxed a little and listened to Jesus's soothing voice.

When he stopped singing, Daryl felt slightly disappointed.

"Are there any songs you like?"  
Jesus asked him.

Daryl thought for a second.

"There was a song Merle used to play when we drove around in his pick up truck. I think it was called "picture" or some shit. I dunno. That's the first song that came to mind."

Jesus smiled a little.

"Yes, i think I know the song you're talking about."

He stared singing again, and Daryl found himself humming along, very quietly.

So quietly Jesus almost didn't notice. But he did notice, and a smile played across his lips as he continued to sing.

*******

They drove until they passed a large sign that said,

"Welcome To Alabama!"

They decided to get out and stretch their legs for awhile.

The two men tried to scavenge some supplies from nearby stores, but they were just as picked over as the stores in Georgia.

Jesus caught Daryl looking kind of grumpy, and frowned. 

Was Daryl annoyed at him?

No, it was probably because they had tried 5 stores so far, and had no luck.

"Hey, let's go to the beach!" Jesus chirped, wanting to improve Daryl's mood. 

Daryl frowned at him.

"Why?" He grumbled.

"Because it's fun!"

Jesus was going to convince him to go, if it was the last thing he did.

Daryl huffed a little.

"I ain't ever been. Besides, it won't be much fun with all them walkers."

"There probably won't be many walkers there. And you have to go to the beach at some point in your life, Daryl. Come on, my family and I used to go to Gulf Shores all the time."

Daryl did the thing where he looked annoyed and chewed on his lip.

"Alright." He finally muttered.

 *****

A few hours later, Jesus practically bounced in his seat.

"I can see it!" He yelled.

Daryl rolled his eyes, and parked the RV.

Before the vehicle was even fully stopped, Jesus was flinging open the door and running at full speed.

"Paul!" Daryl protested. "Wait! There could be walkers..." He trailed off, as Jesus continued running off out of sight.

"Fuck..." he muttered.

Daryl jumped out of the car and took after Jesus.

He stopped, out of breath, when his feet hit the sand.

There were a few decaying walkers, covered in sand, but not many.

He looked up to see Paul splashing through the water, looking absolutely thrilled.

He felt his heart skip a beat, and walked closer to the edge of the water.

"Don't run off like that again." He growled.

Jesus didn't reply, ignoring him and looking absolutely gleeful. 

He splashed a handful of water at Daryl's face.

Daryl gasped, as salty water hit his eyes.

He growled, and splashed Jesus back as his eyes began to burn. 

"Prick.." he muttered.

Jesus laughed, then splashed him again.

"That's it." Daryl growled.

He shoved Jesus over, and Jesus landed flat on his back, getting drenched with water.

His eyes went wide, and he sputtered.

Then he smirked, and before Daryl knew what was happening, he was pulled into the water next to Jesus.

Salt water filled his mouth, and he spit it out with a look of disgust on his face.

Jesus laughed.

"Truce?" He asked.

Daryl spit again and nodded.

"Truce." He agreed.

Jesus smiled, scooter closer to him in the water, and kissed him deeply.

Daryl kissed back, though everything tasted of salt.

Jesus brushed the wet hair out of Daryl's face.

"I'm glad we could do this..." he murmured.

Daryl felt his heart skip again.

God, how did Jesus do that so easily?

"Yeah. Me too."

The two men eventually got out of the water, and sat on the beach.

They leaned against each other, quietly watching the sunset.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song chosen for this chapter is "Somewhere Only We Know" by Keane.

The next day, they came across a decaying military base.

Jesus's eyes went wide.

"Do you think there'll be any guns in there?" He asked Daryl.

Daryl shrugged.

"Only one way to find out"

******

They entered the abandoned base, and it was eerily quiet.

Daryl was tense, his crossbow held out in front of him.

Lights flickered as they walked down the long hallway.

Jesus stopped suddenly in front of Daryl, and sucked in a deep breath.

Daryl soon saw why Jesus had stopped.

There was blood splattered across the white tiles, and there was a trail of blood leading into a poorly lit room. It appeared to be some kind of lab.

Daryl recoiled slightly as the smell of rotting flesh hit him. Jesus gagged slightly, but continued forward.

Bodies were spread across the floor, but none of them were walkers.

They were regular, decaying people, oddly enough. 

They wore bullet proof vests, and Daryl could see no physical injuries.

What had killed all these people?

Jesus looked around the room.

"What do you think happened here?" He asked.

Daryl had no clue. He shrugged, and they continued forward.

What was different about these people?

Why hadn't they turned after their death?

Jesus suddenly gasped, and Daryl's head snapped up.

"Look..." Jesus whispered.

There was a lady, wearing a white lab coat, laying on the floor, eyes open staring at the ceiling.

She was not decaying, nor a walker.

This lady had died recently. Very recently. 

An empty syringe suck out of her arm.

Had she committed suicide? 

Overdosed?

Smashed vials were scattered around her, and right next to her, there was a large brown box labeled,

"Cure."

Jesus and Daryl stared in silence, neither of them moving for a long while. Jesus was the first to move, though hesitant.

With a shaking hand, he opened the box. Inside lay more smashed vials, and he swore. 

"Shit. What _is_ all this?" He asked, shaking his head.

Daryl said nothing.

Jesus leaned down, and looked at the woman's name tag. 

It read: 

"Elizabeth Taylor. FBI genetics modification specialist." 

Jesus felt pure rage, and he threw the nametag aside. 

"Did the fucking government plan this whole thing?" He spat.

Daryl sighed.

"It doesn't matter anymore, Paul."

The fire in Jesus's eyes died a little.

"You're right." He muttered.

He gestured to the box of broken vials.

"It doesn't matter anymore. Let's get out of here. This place is giving me the creeps."

So they left.

There was a lot left unanswered, but for the moment, there was nothing to be done about it.

They could look into it later, maybe with the help of Rick.

******

It was a few days after they had discovered the military base. They had both pushed the experience from their minds, and tried to enjoy themselves.

"Look!!"

Jesus bounced around in his seat.

Daryl jumped, startled.

"It's an Art Museum! Can we go?!"

Jesus turned his large blue eyes on Daryl.

Daryl rolled his eyes.

"No. That would be a stupid risk. All them walkers in there."

Jesus pouted.

"Please?" He asked.

"No." Daryl replied, firmly.

This was one thing he was not going to let Jesus have his way with.

Jesus sighed.

"Fine. Can we stop for he night then? I'm getting tired."

Daryl pulled the RV to the side of the road, and they soon went to bed.

*****

Jesus wasn't tired. He had an idea brewing. If Daryl wouldn't let him go to the museum, he would go himself.

He waited until he heard the soft snores of his partner, then snuck out of the RV as quietly as he could.

He waited for a moment, worried Daryl would wake up and follow him, but he didn't.

Jesus ran across the road and up the stairs of the museum. He picked the locks of the front door in seconds, and then he was in.

He listened quietly, but couldnt hear anything.

Jesus walked quietly through dark galleries, eyes narrowed, looking thoughtfully at the art.

He came across one that he liked far more than the others. It was a large painting of trees in Autumn. He stared at the picture for a few minutes, appreciating the work.

Well, there was no reason why he shouldn't have it.

Paul reached up, and pulled the painting off the wall.

He jumped and dropped the painting when a long, wailing siren greeted him.

The alarms continued to wail, and lights flashed.

Fuck.

******

Daryl woke suddenly to an empty bed, and alarms going off.

He growled.

God damnit.

He left Paul alone for 15 minutes...

Daryl jumped out of bed, grabbed his crossbow, and was racing towards the museum in seconds.

"When I find him, Im going to kill him." He muttered.

******

Jesus swore as he watched dozens of walkers, all stumbling towards him, moaning and snapping. He swallowed. He picked up the painting, and starting springing towards the front doors.

He ran straight into Daryl, who looked furious.

"What the _hell_ do you think you're doing?" Daryl yelled.

Jesus cringed.

"Admiring the Art. Now _run_."

Daryl stared at him in disbelief as Jesus took off running.

"Leave the damn painting Paul!" He yelled.

Jesus shook his head.

"Nuh huh! We need this nice painting of trees!"

Daryl looked murderous.

"I swear to god, Paul, I _will_ kill you if we get out of this alive!"

Jesus ignored him, running out the front doors. Daryl was close behind him.

Jesus ran towards the RV, hoping in and slamming the doors closed. Daryl ran up to the RV, his eyes shooting daggers at Jesus. 

"Get in the RV and _DRIVE_!" 

Jesus yelled, as if Daryl needed to be told this.

Daryl jumped into the RV, and took off, sirens wailing behind them.

 *******

"What the fuck was that, Paul?" Daryl yelled. "What were you thinking?"

Jesus cowered back a little.

"Um... that if you weren't going to see the art with me, I would go alone?"

Daryl's face turned red with anger. He couldn't remember the last time he felt this furious.

He took deep breaths, trying to compose himself. 

After a few minutes of driving in silence, Daryl stopped the RV.

"I can't believe you would do something so _stupid_." He growled.

Jesus looked down at his hands.

"Do you know what I would do if I lost you? _DO_ _YOU FUCKING KNOW WHAT I WOULD DO, PAUL?_ " His voice cracked at the end of the sentence, raw with emotion. 

Jesus shuddered.

"Daryl, I..."

"No. Don't talk to me. If you want to stay with me, then you will  _NEVER_  do something like that again." 

Daryl slammed his hands against the steering Wheel.

"Damnit Paul! I can't lose you..."

He lowered his head into his hands, looking incredibly distraught. 

Jesus choked a little.

"Daryl, I'm sorry. I won't do that again."

Daryl's head snapped up.

"Why would you do that, Paul? How many people do you need to see die before you stop doing stupid things? I lost Beth, and Maggie. I almost lost Carol. Do you want me to lose you too?" 

Jesus stared at him.

"You're right, Daryl. I'm sorry."

And all of the sudden, Daryl had his arms wrapped tightly around Jesus.

He buried his head into Jesus's neck.

"Promise." Daryl whispered. "Promise you won't do that again."

Jesus closed his eyes. "I promise."

 ******

The next day, they drove in tense silence.

It had been hours of driving in silence.

Jesus couldn't take it anymore.

"Daryl, please. Say something."

Daryl glared at him.

"I have nothing to say to you."

Jesus sighed.

"I said I'm sorry, what more do you want?" He snapped.

Daryl didn't respond, and Jesus felt his temper rise, but he said nothing.

He knew he would regret it later if he said what he was thinking now.

More tense silence followed for a minute.

Jesus sighed again.

"Daryl?" He asked, very quietly.

"What?" Daryl snapped.

"It's just that... I love you."

Paul looked down at his hands.

"And I'm sorry."

Daryl stared at him, jaw hanging open. 

He said nothing, still feeling angry, but he didn't pull his hand away when Jesus intertwined their fingers together.

"You....You what?" He asked, thinking he hadn't heard correctly. 

"I love you." Jesus repeated. 

"I... I love you too." Daryl murmured. 

Jesus relaxed a little. 

That was a start, at least.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is "Love Don't Die" by The Fray

Daryl and Jesus went most of the day in a tense silence, despite their earlier declarations.

Daryl was trying not to show how hurt he was about the situation, while Jesus tried to look everywhere but Daryl's face. After awhile, Daryl announced that he was going hunting.

"And you better stay here." He had growled.

So Jesus was now sitting in the RV, staring at the wall, feeling utterly bored.

He knew Daryl was upset, but did he really have to run off and leave him here alone?

He became annoyed thinking about it.

Daryl was allowed to run off alone, but he wasn't, and that hardly seemed fair, but he wasn't going to bring it up, not yet anyway.

Jesus paced around the trailer, then decided to sit outside for some fresh air.

He leaned against the RV, and closed his eyes.

He thought about all of his past families, and wondered if any of them were still alive. As an orphan, he had bounced around families a lot. No one had seemed to want him.

Some of his families had been nice, some had been terrible. He couldn't help but feel smug that some of those people were now probably dead now, but his last family had been kind, and he hoped that they were still alive.

They were the ones that had taken him to the beach he and Daryl had just visited, and he smiled at the memory. In fact, he was pretty sure the old house they lived in was about half an hour away from here.

They had lived in Alabama for a short time before the world had went to hell. After the world he had known ended, he had wandered to Georgia, and made a name for himself at Hilltop.

Jesus thought of the few months he had been alone. He had hardly slept or ate, and had worried about going insane alone in the woods. But then he had found Hilltop, and now he was here, with Daryl.

He wondered if he could convince Daryl to drive to his old house, so he could see it one last time.

Jesus pulled out his knife and spun in around his fingers, bored. He felt nervous, waiting for Daryl to come back, and hoped that the other man was okay.

The knife in Jesus's hand slipped, and he swore as he cut himself. Blood trickled down his hand and he sighed, before wiping the blood on his jeans.

His mind wandered back to Daryl, and he closed his eyes, hoping he would return soon.

 *******

Daryl came back an hour later, with a few squirrels and a possum.

Jesus was nowhere to be seen, so Daryl figured he was in the RV.

He got to work skinning and cleaning the meat, then started a fire. Afterwords, he decided to go find Jesus.

He hoped after the few hours he had been gone, they wouldn't be so tense together anymore.

Daryl opened the RV door, to find Jesus laying on the couch, apparently sound asleep.

He sucked in a deep breath when he saw a pool of blood gathering on his partner's shirt.

He slammed the door shut, annoyed that Jesus had managed to hurt himself.

Jesus jumped, sat up, and quickly tried to hide his hand.

Daryl scowled.

"The hell you do?" He asked, glaring. 

Jesus looked down, slightly embarrassed.

"I accidentally cut myself."

Daryl narrowed his eyes, but said nothing as he walked over to a cupboard, and pulled out a first aid kit.

"Let me see." He muttered.

Jesus hesitantly held out his hand.

Daryl sighed in exasperation. 

"You're hopeless." He stated. 

Jesus gave him a small smile.

"Yeah, I don't know what I would do without you."

His smile turned into a grimace as Daryl poured rubbing alcohol over the cut.

Daryl washed his hand with soap and water, then put some Neosporin over the cut and bandaged it carefully.

He glanced up to see Jesus staring at him, an intense look in his eyes.

Daryl swallowed as Jesus leaned in, and closed his eyes as Jesus placed a small, hesitant kiss on his lips.

"Thank you..." Jesus murmured quietly, pulling away.

Daryl cleared his throat and nodded.

Jesus frowned slightly.

"Are we okay?" He asked.

Daryl looked up at him, pain clear in his eyes. 

Was it supposed to be this hard? 

They stared at each other in silence for a few beats, and Jesus was afraid Daryl would say no.

Daryl grabbed Jesus's uninjured hand and squeezed.

"Yeah." He finally said.

Jesus smiled, and pulled Daryl into a hug. The older man tensed, but didn't pull away.

 ******

They sat outside later that night, eating dinner.

Even though Daryl had assured him things were okay, they were still cautious around each other, scared the other man would snap at any given moment.

Jesus wondered if now would be a good time to ask if they could visit his old house.

"Daryl?" He asked, hesitating.

"Hm?" Daryl grunted.

"My old house is about half an hour from here, and I was wondering if we could stop by for a little bit tomorrow?"

He trailed off, uncertain of himself.

He was surprised when he saw Daryl smile.

"Whatever you want." Daryl replied.

Jesus sighed, feeling content.

He put his head on Daryl's shoulder, and listened to the fire crackle.

******

It was the next day, early in the morning.

Daryl pulled the RV onto a gravel driveway, and turned to Jesus.

"You okay?" He asked.

Jesus nodded, as he stared at the house in front of him.

After a half an hour of driving, they were finally at his old house. 

He got out of the RV, feeling somewhat numb, worried what he might find. The front door was unlocked, and Jesus walked into the house slowly.

Daryl followed, ready to protect the younger man from any possible dangers.

There were no walkers in the house, and Jesus slowly relaxed.

He glanced at the framed pictures of his dads. They had been the first people to accept who he was.

Daryl wandered away from him, looking at more pictures on the fireplace mantle.

Jesus walked into his parents old room. It was exactly as he had remembered it.

He shuddered a little, wondering what had happened to his family.

He stopped walking, and gasped when he saw a small velvet box.

It was still here.

He opened it, and inside where two silver rings.

He swallowed, before shoving the box into his trench coat pocket.

The two men walked around the house for a few more minutes, before Jesus decided he was ready to leave.

They got in RV, and Daryl chose a random direction to drive, as they had nowhere to go.

Jesus said nothing, and Daryl was not about to pressure him into saying anything. He would talk about it when he was ready.

As for Jesus, he was happy for once that Daryl was a quiet person for once. He usually wished Daryl would talk more, but for now, he was thankful for the silence.


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is "Better Together" by Jack Johnson

It was around noon, and both Daryl and Jesus were getting sick of driving. Rain pounded against the RV windows, making it almost impossible to see.

Jesus pointed to a gas station.

"Let's stop here. There's a fair amount of trucks we could take gas from, and I'm hungry. Gas stations usually have snacks."

Daryl nodded, and pulled over.

Even though it was pouring rain, Daryl couldn't wait to get out of the RV and stretch his legs.

Jesus flung the door open, and ran into the gas station, trying to stay as dry as possible.

Daryl walked slowly, not caring that he was getting soaked. Jesus rolled his eyes.

"Could you be any slower?" He asked.

Daryl smirked.

"Give an old man some time."

 *******

They began searching for anything useful. Jesus opened a bag of chips, popped a one into his mouth, and cringed.

"Stale..." he muttered.

Daryl watched in amusement as Jesus began shoving bags of candy into his trench coat pockets.

Deciding he was okay on his own, Daryl wandered around the dark gas station.

He stopped when he saw a display of keychains, and rotated the display until he found the name "Beth".

He smiled a little, and shoved the keychain in his pocket.

Daryl jumped when Jesus came up from behind him and wrapped his arms around Daryl's waist.

"You're such a softie, even if you don't like to admit it." Jesus teased.

Daryl turned around to glare at him, but Jesus simply laughed.

Daryl sighed, knowing that he had been defeated.

"Find anything good?" He asked, trying to change the subject.

Jesus patted his pockets.

"Yeah. Candy."

Daryl shook his head.

"I mean anything useful."

Jesus gave him a look.

"Daryl. Candy is very useful."

Daryl shook his head again.

"Well, I also found some condoms, if you want me to grab those." Jesus said with a wink.

Daryl choked, and Jesus laughed again. 

"Yeah, you wish." Daryl finally managed to sputter.

Jesus shrugged.

"Yeah, I do. Now let's get out of here. We'll stop for gas when it stops raining."

Daryl flushed a little, then nodded.

He walked out of the gas station slowly, not caring about the rain. 

He was halfway to the RV, when Jesus grabbed his arm, and forced him to turn around.

"What-" Daryl began.

He was cut off by Jesus pressing a firm, quick kiss against his lips.

He pulled away and laughed at Daryl's expression.

"I've always wanted to do that." He explained. "Kiss someone in the rain. I'm a hopeless romantic."

They stood there for a few beats of silence. Both men were now completely soaked.

Daryl looked at the man in front of him. His long hair was plastered to his face. His eyes shown with amusement, and raindrops clung to his eyelashes.

Daryl wondered briefly how this man had ended up in his life, how someone like Jesus could ever love someone like him.

He frowned.

If this apocalypse hadn't happened, he and Jesus would have never gotten together.

Now that Jesus was in his life, he couldn't imagine life without him.

Yeah, he was a pain in the ass, and he talked a lot, but Daryl loved him nonetheless.

"Is something wrong?" Jesus asked, concerned. 

Daryl shook his head.

"Nah. I'm just thinking about what my life would be without you."

Jesus smirked.

"Thinking about how much better life would be?"

Daryl scoffed.

"You know that's not true."

Jesus grinned, and kissed Daryl again.

This time, since Daryl was not caught off guard, he kissed back.

In that moment, neither of them cared that they were standing in the rain, soaking wet.

******

The two men entered the RV, dripping water all over the floor.

Jesus turned to Daryl and smirked.

"Common. Let's get these wet clothes off."

Daryl's breath hitched as Jesus pressed him against the wall, kissing his neck and taking both of their shirts off.

Daryl, feeling somewhat nervous, placed his hands on Jesus's hips, and kissed him back hesitantly.

Jesus slid his pants off, and Daryl followed suit. 

Jesus nudged him towards the couch. He pushed Daryl roughly, and they fell back against the couch in a tangle of limbs and kisses.

"Hold on." Jesus whispered. "I'll be right back."

Daryl watched as Jesus pulled a large green blanket out of the closet.

"Cuddle Time!" Jesus announced.

Daryl growled.

"Oh no. You're finishing what you started."

Jesus raised an eyebrow.

"Well.... if you insist."

 ******

After awhile, they lay tangled together, wrapped in the blanket, talking and giving each other lazy kisses.

Jesus trailed kisses up Daryl's collarbone, then rested his head against Daryl's chest.

"Mm...love you." Daryl murmured.

Jesus smiled as Daryl ran his fingers through his hair. Jesus traced circles around Daryl's chest.

"I love you too." He replied. 

A few minutes later, Daryl was sound asleep. Jesus looked at his partner's face and smiled. He brushed the hair out of Daryl's face, and gently untangled himself from the sleeping man.

He got up, and put on his now dry clothes.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out the small velvet box. He opened it, and stared at the rings, then glanced back at Daryl's face with a look of longing. 

"Soon." He thought.

Though they had been together a short time, he was sure he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Daryl. But for the moment, he wasn't sure that Daryl would want to make that next step, so he would wait.

Something banged loudly against the door, and Jesus jumped. He pushed the curtain away from the window and glanced out.

Looking out the window, he swore loudly. There were a few walkers banging against the side of the RV, but that wasn't the problem. The problem was that there was a giant crowd of walkers heading straight towards the RV.

He swore again, and shook Daryl's shoulders gently.

"Daryl. Daryl, wake up!" He hissed urgently.

Daryl blinked up at him groggily.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"There's a gaggle of walkers coming this way. We need to move."

Daryl was at the steering wheel in an instant. The engine roared to life, then died. Daryl swore.

"We're out of gas."

Jesus ran his hands through his hair, trying to stay calm.

"We'll just have to wait it out. Stay quiet. Wait for them to move past us." He finally said.

Daryl could see Jesus fighting to stay calm. He stood up and wrapped his arms around the younger man. 

"Hey. It'll be okay. We've survived worse situations than this."

Jesus nodded.

They sat together on the couch, and listened to the walkers moaning and banging into the side of the RV.

Daryl tried to distract Jesus by talking to him in a low soothing voice.

They sat there until it was very late, before the noises subsided.

"See?" Daryl said. "We're okay."

Jesus let out a breath, and finally let go of Daryl.

"Why don't you get some sleep. It's late." Daryl commented.

Jesus frowned, not wanting to go to bed yet.

His heart was still racing, and he was wondering if a walker would be able to get in the RV.

Daryl sighed.

"It's okay. I'll keep watch for awhile."

Jesus thought about everything for a moment. 

How was it, that after the past few years, he still wasn't over his fear of the walkers?

What if something happened while he was asleep?

What if something happened to Daryl?

He shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts.

He trusted Daryl. It would be okay.

He nodded to himself, and laid down on the couch.

Daryl sat on the floor next to him, stroking his hair, until Jesus was fast asleep


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is "I Got You" by Jack Johnson.

They slept in shifts, both still worried about the heard of walkers that had just passed.

It was Jesus's turn, and he watched as Daryl tossed in his sleep.

He wondered what Daryl was dreaming about. 

*****

_Daryl watched as Jesus ran ahead of him on the beach._

_Jesus was getting farther and farther away from Daryl, and he was starting to get worried._

" _Paul! Slow down!" He yelled._

_But Jesus ran on, not hearing his calls._

_He watched as Jesus walked into the ocean, a bright smile on his face._

_Jesus walked out into the water until it was about waist deep._

_All of the sudden, a hand shot up from the water._

_A look of horror washed over Jesus's face as he desperately tried to scramble away from the corpse in front of him._

_"Daryl!" He screamed. "Daryl, help!"_

_Daryl tried to run, tried to do SOMETHING, Anything to help._

_But he couldn't._

_He was frozen in place, slowly sinking into the ground, as if trapped in quick sand._

_He tried to yell out to Jesus, but he had no voice. He stood there, sinking and screaming silently, as he watched the hand pull Jesus under the water._

_The dream shifted, and Daryl and Jesus were now sitting in their living room back at Alexandria._

_Jesus was laughing at him, but It was not a warm, happy laugh._

_It was something cold, something evil, almost nonhuman._

" _Did you really think I would ever love YOU?" Jesus spa_ t.

_He laughed at Daryl's face._

_"You really did believe that I loved you!"_

_Jesus shook his head_.

_"Oh Daryl, no one will ever love you."_

 

Daryl jolted awake as Jesus shook him.

He could feel a single tear trickle down his face. He wiped it away hastily, hoping Jesus had not seen him crying.

Jesus looked at him, concerned.

"Daryl? Are you okay?" He asked.

"M'Fine." Daryl grunted.

Jesus knew better.

Daryl was most definitely not okay.

He had been tossing, turning, and whimpering all night.

He sighed.

"What was the dream about?" Jesus asked quietly.

He had his fair share of nightmares.

He understood how... _real_ they felt.

Daryl was obviously embarrassed about this dream, he could see it written all over his face.

Jesus shook his head.

Daryl had no reason to be embarrassed.

Everyone had nightmares now.

Daryl hesitated a few seconds before saying,

"It was... about you."

Jesus froze.

"You don't have to tell me.." he started.

Daryl cut him off.

"I need to. Well, it was two dreams about you, really. The first dream... a walker got you. And I couldn't save you. And the second dream.. you.. well you said you didn't love me. And that no one ever could."

His voice cracked at the end, and he looked at his hands.

Jesus threw his arms around Daryl's neck.

"Oh, Daryl.." he whispered. "I love you. So, so much."

Daryl buried his head into Jesus's shoulder, and to Jesus's surprise, he was crying.

He held Daryl for a long time, until the older man seemed to pull himself together.

"I'm sorry..." Daryl rasped.

Jesus shook his head.

"What for?"

Daryl closed his eyes.

"You deserve so much better..."

Jesus glared at him.

"Don't say that, Daryl. I don't _want_ anyone better."

Daryl said nothing, and Jesus softened a bit.

"Why don't we play a board game? I saw some in the closet..." Jesus suggested.

To Jesus's surprise, Daryl agreed.

Jesus pulled out a chess board and sat next to Daryl at their small table.

Daryl glanced at the chess board and shifted.

"Umm.. Paul?" He asked.

"Hm?" Jesus hummed.

"I've um.. never played chess before." Daryl mumbled, looking embarrassed.

Jesus laughed. "I'll teach you"

 ******

It was two hours later, and Jesus was still trying to teach Daryl the rules. He was trying to stay patient.

"Daryl, you can't move that piece like that.." he said, for the billionth time.

Daryl growled, stood up, and flipped the chess board off the table.

Jesus bit his tongue to keep from laughing.

"Okayyy... so maybe no more chess for tonight? Why don't you clean that up, and I'll grab a different board game?"  
He suggested.

Jesus had to hold his laughter back as he watched Daryl get on the ground and start cleaning up the chess pieces, which had went everywhere.

He walked over to the cupboard and grabbed Monopoly, hoping Daryl had played it before.

He didn't think he could spend another two hours trying to explain rules to a confused Daryl.

Jesus set the game on the table, and went to go make some tea.

That was the one thing he made sure the RV was stocked with before they left, as he was somewhat of a tea addict.

He heated up two cups of water, added the tea bags, and placed them on the table.

Daryl had finished cleaning up his mess and was waiting for him. He glanced at the tea Jesus had placed in front of him.

"Thanks." He mumbled.

Jesus smiled.

"You're welcome. So, do you know how to play this game?" He asked.

Daryl nodded.

Jesus set up the game, and they started playing.

 ******

Jesus had forgotten how long Monopoly took to play. It was about 3 hours later, and Daryl was obviously winning.

"I think you're cheating." Jesus accused. 

Daryl smirked.

"Am not."

Jesus decided to watch him more carefully from now on.

It wasn't even 5 minutes later, when he saw Daryl sneaking a $20 bill from the bank.

"Daryl Dixon!" Jesus yelled. "You are cheating!"

Daryl froze, and then started laughing.

Jesus felt any annoyance at his partner melt away. Daryl rarely laughed, and Jesus forgot how wonderful the sound was.

God, he really did love him.

Daryl stopped laughing and looked at him.

"What?" He asked, seeing Jesus's expression.

Jesus shook his head.

"Nothing. It just, I, uh, forgot how amazing your laugh is."

Daryl could feel himself blush.

God damnit.

How did Paul manage to do that so easily?

"Well, maybe we should just stick to cards next time.." Daryl suggested.

"Hm. I don't know if I really want to play with you again, Mr. Cheater." Jesus said with a smirk.

Daryl rolled his eyes.

"Fine. I won't cheat again."

Jesus narrowed his eyes.

"Promise?" He asked.

"Promise." Daryl replied.


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is "Don't Let Me Down" by Joy Williams.

"Don't leave..." Jesus mumbled as Daryl started getting out of bed. "I want you to stay in bed with me..."

Daryl scoffed at him.

"Yeah, but I'm pretty sure you also wanna eat, too, so I gotta go huntin."

Jesus frowned.

"Could I come with you?"

He didn't want Daryl going out alone.

While he knew Daryl could take care of himself, he was still worried about him. 

Daryl bit his lip and thought for a minute.

He loved Jesus, but sometimes he wanted some time alone. But Jesus was looking at him with large, pleading eyes, and Daryl couldn't say no.

"Fine." He growled. "But you better stay quiet."

******

Jesus stayed quiet almost the entire time, mostly because he was captivated by watching Daryl, and the way he made everything look so easy.

He couldn't believe how relaxed Daryl seemed when he was out hunting. He still couldn't believe that this man was his partner.

Jesus jumped in surprise when Daryl broke the silence after awhile.

"You wanna try shootin it again?" He asked, gesturing to the bow.

Jesus laughed.

"I don't know.. we saw how things went last time I tried. Besides, I was enjoying watching you shoot."

Daryl rolled his eyes.

"Common Paul. You should learn. Its a good skill to have in this world."

 ******

That was how they ended up in the middle of a field, with another makeshift target courtesy of Daryl.

He helped Jesus more this time, as he felt more comfortable touching the man than the last time. He adjusted his hands and stance, and Jesus hit the target quite a few times.

Daryl even smiled a few times, proud of how fast Jesus was picking it up.

He backed away a few feet from Jesus and sat in the grass, watching as Jesus let an arrow fly. 

It hit the bullseye, and he grinned when Jesus turned around to look at him.

The smile on Jesus's face fell in an instant, replaced by a look of horror. 

"Daryl!" He called. "Behind you!"

Daryl spun around, and tried to pull out his knife, but it was too late.

The walker was on top of him in an instant, snapping at his neck.

He pushed its head back, but wasnt able to grab his knife to stab it.

"Paul!" He gasped. "Shoot it!"

Jesus looked at the crossbow in his hands.

"I can't! I might shoot you!" He cried.

Daryl struggled to push the walker off.

Jesus was frozen in place.

"Help..." Daryl rasped.

Jesus finally unfroze.

He moved closer, pulled the arrow back, and let it go.

It hit the walker in the head, inches from Daryl's face.

The walker went limp, and Daryl groaned as he pushed the corpse off of him.

He lay in the grass, flat on his back, panting for a minute.

"Daryl!" Jesus cried. "Are you okay? I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry.."

Daryl coughed, pulled himself to his feet, and smiled a little.

"Told you it would be useful." He rasped.

Jesus let out a deep breath, and flung his arms around Daryl.

****

It was a few hours later, and Daryl and Jesus were heading back towards the Georgia boarder, when Jesus pointed at a store.

"We should see if there's anything good in there."

Daryl wrinkled up his nose.

"At a clothes store?" He asked.

Jesus laughed.

"Uhhh yeah? I've seen your closet. You could use a suit or two."

Daryl rolled his eyes.

"I ain't ever owned a suit. Why start now?"

Jesus felt his eyes grow wide.

"You've never owned a suit? Well, we're gonna fix that right now."

Daryl tried to protest, but Jesus was already unbuckling his seatbelt, and Daryl knew if he didn't stop the RV now, Jesus would just jump out while it was still moving.

He parked the RV, and tried to keep up with Jesus.

The doors of the Men's Wearhouse were unlocked, and there were only about a dozen walkers roaming the store.

They opened the doors, and watched as the walkers stumbled out one by one. 

They took care of them quickly, then entered the store.

 ******

It was about two hours later, and Daryl felt as though he had tried on a million things at this point.

Jesus finally had picked out two suits for him, and was attempting to teach him how to tie a tie.

It was almost as useless as trying to teach Daryl chess, and Jesus eventually gave up.

"Well, you'll just have to have me tie your ties for you, I guess." He said.

They left the store, and Daryl began driving back towards the Kingdom.

He was looking forward to seeing Carol.

******

They arrived at the Kingdom later that night. Carol greeted them, looking tired, but happy. 

"You're back." She commented.

Daryl nodded and gave her a hug.

Carol smiled happily. 

"That means we can have the wedding tomorrow! I was waiting for you to come back."

Daryl froze.

"You didn't have to wait for me." He grumbled.

"Yes I did, Daryl. I want you to be in my wedding. We want you to be the best man."

She took his hand.

"What do you say?"

Daryl couldn't speak.

He had never been asked to do anything like this before.

He choked up a little.

"I would love that." He responded, voice cracking. 

Carol grinned.

"Right. That means you need to shower tomorrow morning."

Daryl scowled, but that only made Carol laugh.

She took Daryl and Jesus to an empty house where they would stay the night.

Jesus watched Daryl has they laid in bed together.

He looked happy, happier than Jesus thought he could look.

"Goodnight, Daryl." He whispered.

"Night." Daryl replied.

With that, both men were sound asleep.

******

It was the next day around noon.

A beautiful display was set up for the wedding, complete with flowers and fountains. The entire town was there for the wedding.

A few people from Alexandria were there, including Rick, Michonne, Sasha, Rosita, Eric and Arron.

Daryl had showered and was in his new suit.

He thought he looked stupid, but Carol's eyes had shown when she saw him, and he figured feeling stupid was worth the look on Carol's face.

Carol looked beautiful, of course, and he wondered where she had found such a beautiful wedding dress.

Daryl stood next to Ezekiel, and watched Carol walk down the isle, while an older man played piano.

He listened to their vows, and though he would never admit it, he had teared up a little during the ceremony.

Daryl sat next to Jesus while he watched a few couples dance. The party after the wedding had been huge, and though it was late into the night, it was still going.

Jesus smirked at him, and Daryl groaned, knowing what he was about to do. 

He stood up, offered Daryl his hand, and asked, 

"May I have this dance?"

Daryl rolled his eyes, but accepted anyway. 

They swayed together, and Jesus laughed as Daryl stepped on his feet.

"I don't know why you insist on dancing at every party." Daryl growled.

Jesus simply smiled.

"Because that's what couples do, Daryl."

Jesus paused, then said,

"Remember the first time we danced?" 

Daryl looked down at his feet. Of course he remembered. How could he forget?

"That's why I wanted to dance tonight, so I could be reminded of that moment." Jesus explained.

Daryl scoffed.

"You really are a hopeless romantic."

Jesus smirked.

"Oh yes. But I'm yours."


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Double update today!! This chapters song is "Bleed" by Hot Chelle Rae

After staying in the Kingdom for a few days, the group returned to Alexandria and the Hilltop.

The second Daryl and Jesus were back at Alexandria, Jesus pulled Daryl aside.

"We need to talk to Rick about a few things." Jesus whispered.

Daryl shot him an annoyed look. 

"Right now?"

Jesus sighed when he looked at his partners face. He looked so tired.

"Why don't you go back to the house, and I'll go talk to Rick alone?" Jesus suggested.

Daryl hesitated, but he eventually agreed.

He wasn't particularly in a talkative mood, not that he usually was, but today he was more moody than usual. He supposed it was because he had left Carol, and that always put him in a bad mood.

He nodded at Jesus, and started walking back towards his house. No- it was their house now. 

He smiled a little at the thought.

Jesus watched Daryl as he walked back to their house.

Even though they were back inside the walls of Alexandria, Jesus still worried something would happen to his partner.

Once he was sure Daryl was safely inside their house, he went off to find Rick.

He eventually found him, and they went off to talk in the center of Alexandria. 

 

*****

Jesus and Rick sat outside on a bench near the park at Alexandria. 

They had been talking about the trip for quite some time now. 

"What do you think it means? The lab with all the broken vials? Do you think we should look into it?" Jesus asked Rick.

Rick rubbed his temples.

"You said that the lady was dead, right? How do we know if the "cure" killed her not? I don't want to risk anyone's lives on this. Besides, you said all the vials were broken anyway, right?"

Jesus frowned.

He wasn't sure if they should investigate this any further or not.

Rick did have a point, though. Even if they did find more vials, who would want to be a lab rat?

He eventually agreed with Rick, and they moved on to other parts of the trip.

Rick laughed when Jesus talked about stealing the painting of trees. He also commented on how good it was for Daryl to get out.

"About Daryl.." Jesus began.

Rick raised an eyebrow.

"Yes. About Daryl. I've been meaning to talk to you about him. Daryl is one of my closest friends. He is very important to me, and all of Alexandria. So if you hurt him, I will take you to the Kingdom, and Carol will feed you to her tiger."

Jesus shook his head and laughed a little.

"No, of course. I would never intentionally hurt him. I just wanted to tell you. I'm thinking....I'm thinking about asking him to marry me, and I wanted to know your opinion. Do you think he would say yes?"

There was silence for a minute, and then a large smile lit up Rick's face.

"I can't speak for Daryl. But I've never seen him care for someone like he has for you. I think if you ask him, you have a pretty good chance he'd say yes."

Jesus smiled, and the two continued talking about the trip, and what had happened in Alexandria while he was gone.

 ******

After a few hours of talking, Jesus left to go home.

He walked in the front door, and was surprised to see Daryl sound asleep on the couch.

He smiled, grabbed a blanket from the hallway closet, and gently threw it over Daryl.

He went upstairs to shower, and then fell asleep in their room. It was odd sleeping in an empty bed, but he was so tired he didn't mind all that much.

Daryl woke up on the couch, with a sore neck and back.

He groaned, and got up. As he massaged his neck, he wondered what he should do for the day.

He hadnt seen Beth in forever, but he had just arrived back at Alexandria, so he probably shouldn't run off again so soon.

He decided that he would go offer to take guard duty or go hunting.

Daryl scribbled a quick note for Jesus, and left for the day.

****

When Daryl went to the guard tower, Aaron smiled and gratefully let him take watch for awhile.

Daryl relaxed.

As much as he loved Jesus, it was nice to be alone for awhile.

When Jesus woke up, he found the house was empty. He found a note that said, "Went out for the day, be back for dinner."

He frowned. Well, that was descriptive.

He glanced out the window. The leaves were starting to turn red and orange. It was finally getting cooler out. That was nice, but it also meant that it would be winter soon. 

He sighed, and wrapped his trench coat a little bit tighter around himself.

He looked down at the painting of trees on the floor, and decided he would hang it up so he had something to do.

The house seemed so empty now that Daryl was gone. 

He had gotten used to Daryl's company, but he knew Daryl would want some time alone, so he wouldn't go looking for him.

After he had hung up the painting in the living room, Jesus decided to visit Tara. They had a nice lunch and chatted happily for a few hours.

It was getting dark, and Tara was starting to feel a bit sick. She looked pale, and coughed a lot. When Jesus had asked if she was alright, Tara insisted that she was fine, and he better get back to Daryl for dinner.

Jesus left reluctantly, making it clear that he didn't really want to. He wanted to make sure she was okay, but Tara practically shoved him out of the house, so he decided she would be okay.

When Jesus got back to the house, Daryl was already there. He was standing at the counter, eating a bowl of cereal.

Jesus stood next to him for a few minutes, and they talked about their days.

Daryl frowned.

"Yeah, I went over to Rick's house for awhile. Michonne was pretty sick. She didn't seem so good."

"Really?" Jesus asked. "I saw Tara, and she was sick too. There must be something going around."

Daryl shrugged dismissively.

"Probably just the flu."

Jesus nodded, though he wasn't so sure.

*******

It was the next day, early in the morning, when a piercing scream woke Daryl up.

He jumped out of bed, and went to investigate, Jesus by his side.

The screams were coming from a few houses down.

"Mommy! No! Someone, help me!"

Daryl watched as Rick tackled a figure to the ground and started to stab it repeatedly.

A few people around him gasped, and the little girl that had been screaming started to sob.

"Why was she trying to hurt me? She didn't seem that sick yesterday!" The girl gasped.

Rick frowned.

"What do you mean, not that sick?" He asked the girl.

She continued sobbing.

"She said she had a cold, but then she was coughing blood, and then she turned into that... that monster!"

Daryl froze as he began to connect the dots. 

Michonne was sick.

Tara was sick.

God knew how many more people were sick. 

He looked up, and locked eyes with Rick.

The look on his face told Daryl he was thinking the same thing.

Rick walked over to Daryl as another lady began comforting the little girl.

"It could be a coincidence.." Rick whispered to him.

Daryl shook his head.

"The people that are sick should be put in isolation, just to be safe." 

Rick cringed.

The thought of leaving Michonne alone was not very appealing, but he called a town meeting, and explained that anyone who thought they were sick, even with a little cold, needed to go to the infirmary and stay there until they were sure they were better.

There were, of course, protests, but Rick said that there would be consequences for anyone not willing to participate.

That got most people to shut up, and some started heading towards the infirmary.

After everyone who was sick was in the house they were using as a "hospital", they were counted.

There were 14 people total.

Rick swore, that seemed like a large percentage of the population of Alexandria.

He ordered someone to guard the patients at all times, in case something was to happen.

******

3 days later, 8 of the 14 patients had died.

There was no doubt in everyone's mind that this disease was deadly.

Most people stayed inside their houses, and did not come out more than what was absolutely necessary.

Everyone feared they would catch the disease, so no one talked, and everyone stayed isolated mostly.

Daryl asked Rick about Michonne and Tara everyday, but they both seemed to slowly be getting worse, and Rick was a mess.

******

It had been a few days since anyone new had gotten sick or died.

People were slowly starting to relax.

Jesus was sitting on the couch with Daryl, when all of the sudden, Daryl started coughing and wheezing.

Jesus pounded his back, concerned. 

Daryl cringed, walked over to the bathroom, and began throwing up.

Jesus's eyes went wide as Daryl coughed up a bit of blood onto the floor.

"No.." Jesus whispered. "No, Daryl.."

Daryl stood up and backed away from Jesus slowly.

"Paul. It will be okay. I'm fine."

"FINE?" Jesus yelled. "YOU THINK THIS IS FINE?"

Daryl sighed.

"You've been exposed to me too long already. I need to leave. I need to go into isolation with the others."

Jesus felt desperation building inside of him.

"No. No, no, no. You aren't sick.  
You can't be. It's been days. You're okay."

Daryl said nothing for a few moments.

"I have to go, Paul." He finally whispered.

Jesus felt tears gathering in his eyes as he watched Daryl leave.

He felt numb, so helpless.

He slammed his fist against the kitchen table.

He wasn't going to let Daryl die. Not after everything they'd been through.


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is "From Where You Are" by Lifehouse

Jesus stood outside of the large room that held all of the sick patients. There was a clear plastic divider that separated the sick and the visitors.

Jesus and Rick were really the only people who would even get close to those who were sick, as most people didn't want to risk it.

Jesus had decided he would do anything for Daryl, even if it meant dying.

Daryl was currently asleep on a small cot in the corner of the room. Jesus watched every rise and fall of his chest, terrified he would stop breathing at any given moment.

Blood was spattered across the front of Daryl's chest, and he was pale, not to mention shivering and shaking.

Jesus longed to go to him, wrap him up in a blanket and help him, but he had promised that he would stay on the other side of the plastic.

Jesus pulled out the velvet box from his trench coat pocket. He opened it, and looked at the rings, before looking back at Daryl, who was still sound asleep.

He closed his eyes and took a deep, shuddering breath.

He should've asked Daryl.

If he died, at least he would have known it was only because death had made them part. But now it was too late.

He pressed his forehead against the wall next to him, his eyes still closed. He stood there like that for a moment, holding the rings.

Jesus jumped when someone put a hand on his shoulder.

Rick was standing next to him.

"We're gonna get through this. We always do." Rick said quietly.

Jesus could only nod, as he didn't trust his voice.

He wished more than ever that Maggie could be here with him. She would know what to do, and what to say to make him feel better. But she was not here, and that only made everything worse.

He stared at the rings for a moment more, before angrily shoving them back into his pocket.

This wasn't fair, god damnit. Daryl had already been through hell. They had all been through hell. They had lived through an apocalypse, through a war, and now a god damn disease was going to kill them.

He looked back at Daryl, who was now awake and watching him.

When Jesus looked at him, Daryl stood up shakily, and walked towards the plastic.

Jesus shook his head frantically, trying to convey that Daryl shouldn't be getting up right now.

Daryl simply rolled his eyes, and stood in front of him.

They could talk, but it was muffled, and besides, talking would wake up the other patients.

Daryl stared at Jesus, and smiled a small smile.

"I love you." Daryl mouthed.

Jesus felt the tears gathering.

Fuck.

He had promised himself he wouldn't cry.

A single tear rolled down his face, and Daryl reached out to brush it away, forgetting there was a barrier between them.

His arm dropped to his side after it hit the plastic. Jesus reached out and put his hand against the plastic.

On the other side, Daryl put his hand over Jesus's.

They stood like that for quite some time, before Daryl started coughing again.

Jesus told him to go lay down and get some rest. When Daryl was back in his cot and asleep, Jesus reluctantly decided he should go back to their house.

It was late, and he needed to sleep. The doctor came to talk to him for a few minutes before he left.

He explained that while sick, Daryl was doing better than some other patients, and he still had a chance of pulling through. Jesus nodded, and although he should've felt hopeful, he felt nothing.

******

Jesus went home, but he couldnt sleep. The bed was cold and empty. Giving up on sleep, he got up and started pacing.

He cleaned the house. Made beds. Organized a few things. Ate some stale chips. Desperately tried to take his mind off of everything.

Eventually, he fell asleep on the couch.

 _He dreamed of Maggie_.

_He dreamed that she and Glenn were standing in a meadow. Maggie reached out and held Jesus's hand._

" _It's not his time yet." She whispered. "He's going to be okay."_

_Jesus wrapped his arms around her._

_"What if he's not okay, Maggie? What do I do without him?"_

_Maggie looked sad, and Glenn put his hand on Jesus's shoulder._

_"He's going to be okay, I promise." Glenn reassured him._

_Jesus nodded, though he wasn't so sure. They sat together in the meadow for awhile, Maggie and Glenn whispering comforting words to Jesus._

When Jesus woke, he sighed.

It had just been a dream. It wasn't real, and Daryl could still be dying.

He forced himself to shower and eat breakfast, even though he wasn't hungry.

He felt exhausted. He left the house, hair a mess, large dark circles under his eyes.

When was the last time he had been so tired?

He walked through the empty streets to the hospital.

Everything was all too quiet.

He thought about the last time Daryl had been in the hospital.

The doctor had told him that Daryl might never recover from being shot, but he had been fine then, right?

Daryl was one of the strongest people he knew, and if anyone would survive this, it would be him.

The minute Daryl recovered, he would tell him everything he had wanted to say for the past few days.

Jesus arrived at the hospital, and sat down next to the plastic barrier.

He noticed that the number of bodies in the room had declined significantly.

There were now several empty beds, but Daryl was still there.

He relaxed a little, and scanned the other beds.

Rick entered then, and sat next to Jesus. He said nothing, just closed his eyes.

"Where's Tara?" Jesus asked quietly, seeing her bed was empty.

Rick slowly opened his eyes, and Jesus was shocked at how bloodshot they were.

His face showed no emotion, and he sighed.

"She...passed away late last night." Rick said, voice hoarse.

Jesus watched as the room lurched sideways.

He closed his eyes, trying to push away the nausea he felt.

The two men sat in silence for a long time.

"How's Carl and Judith?" Jesus eventually asked, knowing he wouldn't be able to talk about Tara. 

Rick stared blankly at the wall in front of them, and Jesus thought that Rick hadn't heard him.

"They're okay." Rick finally murmured.

They fell into silence again.

Jesus turned to look at Daryl, who was sound asleep.

He thought about the moment that he knew he was in love with Daryl.

There were so many moments that he loved, but the exact moment he knew he was in love, was when Daryl taught him how to shoot his crossbow.

He knew, that night, that he was in love.

But hell, he had probably started falling for Daryl the first time he had seen him.

He smiled a little, thinking about everything.

All the times Daryl had saved him.

All the talks on their couch.

How he had felt when the saviors had taken Daryl as their prisoner.

How he had felt when Gregory had shot him. He had been so angry, and it was all to easy to kill Gregory. At least then he had something to take his anger out on. But now, he couldn't kill a disease, and he felt helpless.

He watched Daryl's every breath, and internally mourned the death of Tara.

He and Rick sat in silence, until they were both asleep.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter guys! Kate and I would like to thank you for being with us during this long journey. She has a little author's note that i'll be adding to the end of this chapter in the notes. I also would like to thank Kate for dealing with my stupid ideas and somehow incorporating them into the fic lol. The song for this chapter is "Say Something" by A Great Big World.

Jesus watched as the doctor examined Daryl. He wore a mask and gloves, trying to protect himself from the disease. He had put an IV in Daryl's left arm, and he looked somewhat concerned.

The doctor eventually left the room, after he had finished examining all of the patients.

He pulled off his mask and gloves, and walked over to Jesus.

"Mr. Rovia, is it?" He asked.

Jesus nodded, feeling numb.

"And you are Mr. Dixon's... significant other?" The doctor inquired.

Jesus simply nodded again.

The doctor drew in a deep breath.

"Mr. Rovia, there is never an easy way to say this. I'm afraid Mr. Dixon isn't doing very well."

The room swam in front of Jesus. He leaned against the wall for support.

"What do you mean..." Jesus whispered.

The doctor gave him a look of pity.

"I don't think Mr. Dixon is going to make it.." he responded, very quietly.

There was silence. Jesus closed his eyes.

"I'm sorry, I can't let you into the room to see him, but you can say your goodbyes from here." The doctor said.

Jesus thought his heart had stopped beating.

Everything was moving around him in blurs.

He felt nothing.

Before he even knew what he was doing, he was slamming his fists against the plastic, over and over again.

The doctor yelled at him to stop, but Jesus didn't hear.

There was a ringing in his ears, and all he could think about was getting to Daryl.

The plastic began to crack, and the the doctor called Rick into the room.

Rick tried to hold Jesus back, and wrapped his arms around his body, but Jesus fought against him.

He slammed his entire body against the plastic, and both he and Rick fell through the now destroyed wall.

He rolled away from Rick, and threw himself over Daryl.

"Daryl." He gasped. "Daryl. Please. Open your eyes. I'm here. You're okay. Daryl, wake up!" He begged.

He shook Daryl, and was aware of tears sliding down his face.

"Please. Wake up. I love you. Please. YOU NEED TO FUCKING BE OKAY, DARYL."

Jesus wasn't even aware that his voice had grown louder and more desperate with each word.

He slammed his fist against the bed.

"DAMNIT DARYL." He yelled.

His voice cracked, and he broke off in a sob.

"I need you.." he whispered.

He fell to his knees next to the bed, and he felt a hand on his shoulder.

He looked up.

The doctor stood there, looking at him with a sad expression.

"I'm sorry." The doctor said quietly."I'm afraid he's gone."

"No!" Jesus screamed. "I was going to ask him to marry me! I can't lose him now... not yet..."

Jesus stood up.

"You're a fucking doctor! Do something! Why can't you do something!" He yelled desperately.

The doctor turned to a nurse and nodded.

"I'm sorry." He simply said. 

The nurse stepped forward, and Jesus felt something sharp in his right arm, and then the world went black.

******

Jesus woke up on an unfamiliar couch.

He glanced around the room, and he saw Rick standing in a corner of the room.

Rick was staring at nothing, his blue eyes completely blank.

Jesus cleared his throat, and Rick jumped.

He looked at Jesus and frowned.

"I know you're upset. But what you did back there... we had to sedate you."

Jesus shook his head.

"I know." He whispered. "I'm sorry."

Rick took a deep breath, and found himself suddenly hugging Jesus.

It was all sinking in now, that Daryl was really gone.

"I know it's hard..." Rick whispered. "But we can get through this, just like we always do."

Jesus closed his eyes.

"I don't _want_ to get through this. If Daryl's not here, I don't want to be here either."

He took a deep breath.

"I never got the chance to tell him that I wanted to be his husband, to be his partner forever.. and I can't live with that. I can't live every day, knowing that he died, and I'm still here, alive and okay. I can't do this without him."

Rick pulled away to look at him.

"I can't stop you from doing what you want. But is this what Daryl would have wanted for you? Would he have wanted you to live in eternal guilt, or stop living all together?"

Jesus looked at his hands. No. This is not what Daryl would have wanted.

Rick knew he had made his point, and said nothing more. 

*******

 

The nurse looked at the lifeless body of Daryl Dixon.

She let out a small sigh.

Such a shame, really, that all these people had died lately.

She was about to put a white sheet over Daryl's body, when his arm moved.

The nurse paused for a moment.

It was not all that uncommon for people to move after death.

She reached out, and put her fingers on his wrist.

There was a very weak pulse, but it was there.

She drew her hand back in surprise.

"Doctor!" She called. "Come quick!"

******

Daryl woke with a gasp.

Everything hurt.

He coughed for a few minutes. 

He opened his eyes, and looked around the room.

The lights were so bright, they hurt his eyes.

He looked up to see Rick and a Doctor, both staring at him, shocked.

"What?" He rasped.

Rick put a hand against the wall to steady himself.

"We thought you were dead.." Rick explained quietly.

Daryl frowned.

"Where's Paul?" He simply asked.

"I'll get him in a minute." Rick responded. "But we need to talk about something first..."

*******

Jesus opened his swollen eyes when he heard a knock at the door.

He debated getting up to answer it, because after all, what was the point anymore?

But he got up, and answered it anyway.

Rick stood there.

"What?" Jesus snapped.

He was in no mood for visitors.

"Come with me. Daryl's not dead. Hes okay, and he's a awake, and he wants to talk to you." Rick stated.

Jesus felt his mouth drop open.

"What?" He asked.

Was this a dream?

"The doctor couldn't feel his pulse because it was so weak. But he was alive." Rick explained.

Jesus, who had finally decided that this wasn't a dream, took off running towards the hospital.

The doctor led him to a different room than Daryl had been in previously. He apparently now had his own room.

The doctor showed Jesus into the new room, and then left, closing the door behind him.

Jesus stared at Daryl.

"You're really okay..." He whispered.

Daryl simply stared at him.

"Did you mean it?" He asked.

Jesus frowned, confused.

"Did I mean what?" He asked.

"That you wanted to marry me." Daryl stared bluntly.

Jesus's jaw dropped open.

"What? You heard that?" He asked.

Daryl nodded.

"At first I thought it was a dream. But I asked Rick, and he told me."

Jesus felt the tears prickle at the corner of his eyes.

"Oh, Daryl." He whispered. "Yes. Of course I meant it."

Daryl looked down at his hands.

"Well, I thought you might have said it just because I was dying..."

Jesus was at his side in an instant, hugging him tightly.

"No. I've wanted to ask you since the first day you became my partner."

Jesus pulled away.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out the velvet box.

He hadn't done this before when he had the chance, so he would do it now. He opened the box, taking a deep breath. 

"Daryl?" He said quietly. "Will you marry me?"

He knelt on the floor, waiting for Daryl to answer.

There was silence, and then Daryl nodded, looking stunned. 

Jesus let out a sigh of relief, then pushed one of the silver rings onto Daryl's finger, before placing the matching ring on his own. 

Jesus then intertwined their fingers together, and leaned forward to kiss him gently.

Daryl let go of his hand, and wrapped his arms around Jesus.

"I love you." Jesus whispered. "I thought I had lost you..."

Daryl stared at him intently.

"Can I ask you something?"

Jesus nodded.

"Anything."

"Rick told me... that you said something about ending your own life after I died." Daryl began in a flat tone.

Jesus cringed. "Yes.." he whispered.

"Why?" Daryl demanded.

"Because..." Jesus responded quietly. "It's not living without you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, thank you so much to everyone who read this fan fiction. It was my first one, and I hope you enjoyed it!  
> A HUGE thank you to everyone who left kudos and comments! 
> 
> If you want me to write another fan fiction, leave a comment on what you want! 
> 
> Second of all, I want to thank my very good friend, Dana, for posting this for me. She helped me come up with a lot of ideas, and this story wouldn't have happened without her! 
> 
> I had a really good time writing this, and I hope you enjoyed reading it just as much. 
> 
> Thank you all for reading!


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